"renjun," sorrowful, a voice filled with disdain. "you..you're disgusting.." he spoke. renjun only watched as the other's harsh words fell from his lips like they were just aching to be whispered into existence. "no, no, i swear, he's lying to you." renjun's eyes filled to the brim with tears, his head pounding with pain. "we didn't do anything, i swear!" he hiccups, holding onto the cloth of his lover's shirt.
"you have to believe me, baby.." he sobs into the warm material, the scent of cinnamon flowing into his nose. it only makes him even more afraid. a brutal shove to the shoulder got him away from the taller. "get off me!" he shouts, renjun's hands trembling underneath his gaze. "you're a bitch, you know that? quit crying! you never felt bad when you slept around with him, right?" he yells.
"no! i didn't do anything with him! he lied to you!" renjun cries. he feels a pressure, a heart-stopping impact come into contact with his cheek.
he slapped him.
"you're a filthy cheater, huang renjun. a two-timing cheater." the other growls, his large hands curling into fists. "i don't want to hear from you ever again, hear me? i should have known you were just a shameless little shit.." renjun felt the sobs building up in his chest, choking up in his throat. his face stung from where he struck him.
"i love you."
-
renjun woke up with tears in his eyes. he always hated that memory, doing everything he could to forget it. taking up painting, making new ( amazing ) friends, painting on his own skin. it's worked so far, but that doesn't stop his brain from bringing him all the way back to that dreadful night.
he's learned to deal with it, wiping away his tears and getting up to grab an advil to soothe that pounding headache. he always needs a moment to recollect his thoughts and maybe have a small cry. it was always hard to forget.
today was a sunday. he'd woken up early this morning, his clock reading 09:37 am. he has a lot of daylight to burn through. he doesn't have much to do, so he just hops into the bathroom and runs a bath for himself. it's certainly been a while since he's had a nice, hot bath. and plus, he thinks he needs it.
peeling off the layers of pajamas he trapped himself in the night before, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. golden skin, a thin waist, gently sculpted muscles along his legs and arms. he bites his bottom lip looking at every feature of his body. was he really as disgusting as he told him he was? even with this little body, was he really incapable of anything? renjun runs a hand through his hair.
no, he thinks. no. i'm not ugly. i'm not disgusting. if i was so disgusting..why would you tell me i'm beautiful every day? why would you lie? because you're the repulsive one. not me. renjun smiles to himself. he steps into the bathtub, the hot water engulfing his body. he feels content in his own skin for once, happy. the place on his face where he was once struck all those years ago suddenly doesn't sting if he thinks about it. no, it's as if flowers have bloomed in its place.
and renjun feels okay.
-
"yuqi." soyeon grumbles, braids dangling by her shoulders. "are you done writing yet?" she asks, nudging the girl with her elbow. they walked along the sidewalk together, yuqi's thumbs racing to jot down every word. she was posting the photo they'd taken days earlier. as yuqi called it, it was 'their goldmine of gossip.' soyeon just likes to support her. "i'm almost done. by the time we reach the little coffee shop we'll be blowing up with comments!" she chirps.
soyeon likes to run this account with yuqi. she doesn't exactly run the actual account, she mostly takes photos to send to yuqi. yuqi is her best friend, and they match clothes almost every day. today soyeon wore a cropped pink shirt, white high-rise pants that opened up at the ankles. yuqi wore a pink sweater with shorts and white platformed shoes so they could match. soyeon always found it cute how much effort she put into their styles.
