Identity

"There's something I've been keeping from Hanna for a long time that I'm afraid will do her more harm than good if she finds out about it," Ashley said softly to Dr. Sullivan. Mrs. Marin was currently seated on a black loveseat opposite her daughter's former shrink. She was having a session with the doctor because of her daughter's current changes in behavior. She was at a loss of what to do with Hanna. She knew Dr. Sullivan had helped Hanna before, so Ashley figured she could help her again, but this time it was Ashley who was visiting the therapist.

"Is that why you have come to me, Ashley? Do you want to tell me what you're keeping from your daughter? Getting it off your chest might remove a great deal of stress for you and ultimately for Hanna as well," replied Dr. Sullivan.

"Okay," Ashley replied. "But let me just start by saying that Hanna and I aren't the only ones involved, and speaking about this could cause problems to arise amongst the others."

"Ashley, it's just you and I here. I'm required by law to protect my patient's privacy by not revealing the contents of their therapy, that is unless said person is harmful to himself/herself/themselves or other people."

"Okay," Ashley said again. "This is quite a story. But then again, this is Rosewood; everything that happens here seems to be out of the ordinary," she paused and looked Dr. Sullivan straight in the eye before saying: "Hanna is not my daughter."

Dr. Sullivan's eyes widened. "She's not my biological daughter. My ex-husband Tom and I adopted her from Jessica DiLaurentis," Ashley added and then paused again. She knew Dr. Sullivan had figured out why Ali's mom putting Hanna up for adoption might do more harm than good if she told her daughter.

The gears were turning in Dr. Sullivan's head, and she could see how this story was going to play out. Before Ashley could continue, Dr. Sullivan asked: "Does that mean that Hanna and Alison are twins?" She knew the girls had to be sisters if they had the same mother. The girls were the same age, so they'd either have to be half-sisters if they had different fathers or twins. Dr. Sullivan assumed the latter because of how similar the two girls looked.

Ashley closed her eyes and slowly nodded her head in response. "Forgive me for sounding rude, but how do they not know that they are twins? I mean they're best friends, they must know they have the same birthday. Plus, they look so much alike," Dr. Sullivan asked, dumbfounded.

"I think deep down, Alison knows," answered Ashley. "Back in middle school, Ali chose Emily, Aria, Spencer, and Hanna to be her best friends for a reason. Emily was the star athlete, Aria was the star of the drama club, and Spencer was in charge of literally every club the school had to offer. Each girl was popular in their own way. Ali wanted to cash in on that popularity. What better way to be the queen bee then by being the leader of the school's most popular girls? However, Hanna was far from being popular in middle school. My divorce from Hanna's dad, well Tom, was hard for Hanna. She started gaining weight and anyway, what I'm trying to say is, is that Ali might have chosen Hanna to be in her group because she felt a connection to her, maybe a familial one. Why else would she have been friends with Hanna? She wasn't popular like the other girls. Ali must've chosen Hanna to be her friend for some other reason, and I think that reason is that Ali knew her and Hanna were family somehow. Ali picked on all the girls, but she picked on Hanna the most. With the other girls, Ali just held their secrets over their heads as any other friend would do. But with Hanna, Ali constantly made fun of Hanna for her weight and even gave her the nickname 'Hefty Hanna.' I don't know. Although it was cruel, that kind of teasing sounds like something a sibling would do if you ask me."

"And Hanna has no idea that she and Ali are sisters, never mind twins?" asked Dr. Sullivan.

"No, she doesn't. And to answer your earlier question, Ali and Hanna don't have the same birthday. Ali was born on March 6th, a little before midnight, and Hanna was born about two hours later on March 7th. Let me go back to the beginning. Yes, Jessica DiLaurentis is Ali and Hanna's biological mother," Ashley said sadly. "But this is where it gets crazy, Kenneth Dilaurentis is not their father. As far as I know, Ken doesn't know Ali isn't his, or Jason for that matter, but that's another story".

Dr. Sullivan gave Ashley a confused look. "What do you mean Ken doesn't know Ali isn't his? Don't you mean that he doesn't know Ali AND Hanna aren't his?"

"No. When Jessica got pregnant with the twins, she didn't know she was having twins. She thought she was only having Ali".

Before Dr. Sullivan could ask how Jessica didn't know she was having twins, Ashley continued: "Every time Jessica would go in for an ultrasound, only Ali would appear on the sonogram. Hanna couldn't be seen on screen because, I guess, she was always hiding in Jessica's uterus." Ashley sadly thought how even in their mother's womb, Hanna was still in Ali's shadow. She shook that thought off and continued her story. "After holding baby Ali for the first time, Ken left Jessica at the hospital, so he could be with a young Jason. Roughly two hours after Ken left, Jessica started having contractions which she thought was just severe after-birth cramps. She called the nurses in, and didn't know she was giving birth until she heard Hanna's cries. Jessica, along with the nurses, was in total shock at the surprise twin." Ashley paused to see Dr. Sullivan's reaction. She looked utterly entranced in Ashley's story. "And it only gets better from here," Ashley added sarcastically. "You would think that Jessica would be happy to know that she was having twins. You might also think that the first person Jessica would call to come (back) to the hospital would be her husband (and "their" son) to come see their new addition. But no, I was the first person she called."

Dr. Sullivan looked at Ashley liked she had three heads. "Why would she call you?" she asked, perplexed.

"Jessica and I worked together. I guess she remembered that day at work when she told me she was having a girl, and I told her I've always wanted a daughter, but couldn't have one of my own. When she called me from the hospital, she told me that she actually had twin girls, and she only wanted to keep one of them. She said Tom and I could keep the other one. I asked her if Ken was okay with it, and she told me that (1) Ken wasn't even the father, and (2) he didn't even know Jessica gave birth twice that night. She told me more about why she was giving me Hanna once I got to the hospital. Hanna was tiny, about the size of a preemie, so the nurses took her to the infant ICU. I didn't get to meet her until after Jessica told me why she was giving me one of her twins. But I immediately fell in love with her as soon as I laid eyes on her." Ashley smiled at the memory of seeing and holding Hanna for the first time. "Anyway, apparently Jessica has a twin sister too. Her name is Mary, and she is a patient at Radley. Jessica never got along with Mary, so when she gave birth to Hanna, she immediately was reminded of her sister (who was in a mental hospital), and wanted nothing to do with Hanna. She must've hated the day when Ali introduced Hanna as her new friend. As I recall, I think Jessica made fun of Hanna's weight too. Can you believe that, though? Jessica finally reunited with Hanna after giving her up for adoption 12 years prior. Instead of being, I don't know, happy to see her estranged daughter and Ali with her twin sister for the first time, she ganged up with Ali in making fun of Hanna all because Jessica hated her sister so much. Also, in college, Jessica's sister dated this guy named Ted. One day, Jessica decided to have fun with Mary by pretending to be her and slept with her boyfriend."

"So is this Ted guy Hanna and Ali's father?" asked Dr. Sullivan. Ashley nodded. "I'm guessing he doesn't know he has twin daughters?" Dr. Sullivan asked.

"He doesn't know. When Jessica told me about the girls' father, she only told me his first name. Funny enough, I'm currently dating that same, Ted. Of course, I didn't know he was Hanna's (and Ali's) father at the time. But seeing my daughter and Ted side by side made me realize that he was indeed the Ted that Jessica was talking about. Plus, he has been a better father to Hanna than Tom has ever been. I don't know if he feels a connection to Hanna like Ali might have, or he's just a great guy. And did you know that Tom refused to pay for Hanna's college? He's paying for his stepdaughter's college instead. I know Hanna isn't Tom's biological daughter, but he has always treated her poorly. At least her biological father treats her right," Ashley added.

"The news of Jessica DiLaurentis' murder didn't hit Hanna as hard as it should because Hanna doesn't even know that Jessica was her birth mom. I'm letting Alison stay at my house, in Hanna's room, so she can unknowingly spend time with her sister after they both just lost their mother. But that plan seems to be backfiring because Hanna seems to think that I prefer Alison as a daughter over her. And ever since Ali came back from the dead, Hanna's been having an identity crisis. She's been confused for Ali so many times that she cut and dyed her hair, and changed her clothes to distinguish herself from Ali. She's even reverting to her old ways by shoplifting again. She feels that when Ali went missing, Mona shaped her to be the 'New Ali', and now Hanna doesn't know who she is anymore with Ali back in the picture. On top of that, Hanna's ex-boyfriend Caleb, who left her to help a friend in Ravenswood, is back and now they're both using alcohol as a coping mechanism. Plus I'm dating Hanna's father, but neither he nor Hanna knows that they are father and daughter."

Ashley took a deep breath. "So, do you see my dilemma?" I have to tell Hanna the truth about her birth. She needs and deserves to know. But I feel telling her now is the worst time possible, she'll no longer trust me or look at me or anyone the same way, and it could lead her down an even more dangerous path."

"I know you don't want to hear the word, but do you think Hanna would become suicidal if she ever found out the truth?" asked Dr. Sullivan cautiously.

Ashley held back her tears and swallowed the lump forming in her throat. "If I tell her now, then yes. I do think she would harm herself. She's already got so much on her plate."

"I understand, but maybe telling her the truth would ease her confusion," Dr. Sullivan added.

"What do you mean?" asked a confused Ashley.

"What I mean is, is that if Hanna knew the truth, she would understand why you let Alison stay at your house and why you treated her as if she were your daughter. If Hanna knew Ali was her twin, then she would also know why people were always confusing them for one another. Hanna would know it's because they are twins, and not because Mona transformed her into Ali's replacement after she went missing. I mean Hanna and Ali are best friends. Sure they've had their ups and their downs, what friendship hasn't? But what I'm trying to say is, is that finding out they're sisters, twins for that matter, should bring them even closer together".

Dr. Sullivan paused. "Have you ever heard of twin telepathy?"

Ashley shook her head.

"What it is, is all twins have a connection with their twin sibling. You said you thought deep down that Alison knows that she and Hanna are twins? It's like you said before, Ali chose Hanna to be her friend for a reason. That's important. They had a bond way before they even knew they were sisters."

"That's true. I don't want to sound selfish, but I'm afraid Hanna's going to lash out at me if/when I tell her," Ashley said sadly.

"You're not selfish, Ashley. When Jessica wanted nothing to do with Hanna, merely because she reminded her of her sister, you got up in the middle of the night to claim Hanna as your own. You raised her, and made her into the amazing young lady she is today. Sure, it'll take some time for her to absorb all this information, but that's understandable. Hanna will be grateful after everything you've done for her and for Ali too," answered Dr. Sullivan.

"Are you sure? I mean I know Hanna's not one to hold a grudge, but still. With how her mental state is right now, she could very well take a swing at me," asked Ashley.

Dr. Sullivan chuckled. "Hanna doesn't seem like the violent type to me. She'll probably give you the silent treatment or be distant from you for a while. That's a normal reaction".

"But how do I tell Alison? She's another story. Maybe I should tell Alison first, and then she can tell Hanna? Things would be a lot easier if Jessica were around. She doesn't get to die, and leave me to deal with the damage she caused," Ashley said begrudgingly. "I don't even know if I should tell Ted. I'm not 100% sure he's the father, but my gut is telling me that he is. What if I spring this all on him and I'm wrong? What if I'm right and he walks away because having two daughters he didn't know about is too much for him to handle? I don't think I should even tell Ken that Jessica had twins and neither of them is his," said a worked up Ashley.

"Ashley calm down. Take a deep breath," instructed Dr. Sullivan. Ashley did as the doctor said.

"Do not tell Alison first. If Hanna finds out from anyone but you, then she's going to lose trust in you. I suggest you either tell them together or tell Hanna first. I would tell the girls as soon as possible. You're right, they need to know. Telling them yourself will allow them to ask questions. But if you wait and they find out on their own or from someone else, that could be bad. I don't think it's your place to tell Ken about the twins. He's probably better off not knowing, to be honest. How long have you known or been with Ted? Do you know him well enough to judge his response?" asked Dr. Sullivan carefully.

"I've been in a relationship with Ted for almost a year now. He's a Pastor. I think he can handle this news calmly and with grace. But how do I casually ask him to take a paternity test?"

"Don't. Not yet, at least. Before you say anything to him, make sure he is indeed the same Ted that Jessica told you about it. Ask him if he knows a Mary...?" Dr. Sullivan spoke the sentence as a question because she didn't know what Jessica's twin sister's last name was.

"Drake," answered Ashley.

"Thank you. Anyway, you have to make sure this is the same guy. If it's not the same guy, you don't have to worry about telling him anything. If it is the right Ted, he's probably going to question why you're asking about an old girlfriend. That's when things are probably going to get complicated. Just tell him exactly what you told me. If things get messy, have Hanna and Ali join you in telling him. They might help ease the tension," Dr. Sullivan paused and looked at her clock. "I'm afraid our time is up. Did this session help you in any way, Ashley?"

"Yes. It definitely did. Thank you," answered Mrs. Marin.

"If you want, you can make another appointment with me and tell me how everything went?" asked Dr. Sullivan.

"That would be great. I feel confident. I think I'm going to tell Hanna and Ali as soon as I get home. Ted's coming over for dinner, so I'll talk to him tonight as well. Thank you again, Dr. Sullivan," Ashley said as she stood up from the loveseat.

"It was no problem. It's my job to help people. Please let Hanna know I hope she's doing okay, and if she needs to talk to me after you tell her, I'm all ears. Alison too." Dr. Sullivan said, smiling as she stood up from her chair.

"Good luck, Ashley. Make sure Hanna knows that her identity is all she has when she's at school."

"Thanks. And I will," Ashley said as she made her way to the door, ready to tell her daughter that her whole life has been one big lie.