Reboot 803

Prologue

Eleanor's hand feels warm against mine and the feeling takes me back to all of our shared moments, each stolen kiss, each special night. All of the times that reminded me to stop and breathe in this time of literal-hell. But all of it will be gone soon, once my memory is rebooted, once I lose her. Her. A simple word used in replacement for a female's name. But Eleanor deserves more than pronouns. Eleanor is my love, Eleanor is my soulmate. 

I get up from the bench, and Eleanor waves goodbye. She calls after me, but I don't look back. I can't look back. Each step to Michael's office feels like 1000 knives. 1000 of those acupuncture needles that Vicky used to torture me with. Great. That's another memory that will be lost in a few moments. As painful as it was, they're my memories, and I shouldn't have to lose them. But I do. Jeremy Beraimy, I tell myself. I'll love her until the end of time, and nothing will ever change that. 

***

I finally arrive at Michael's door. The wood feels heavier than it did before and I take a massive sigh. 

"Chidi, are you sure you want to do this? It's a pretty big decision to make."

It's as if he's back to his old ways and is trying to torture me, saying words like "decision" and "are you sure?"I've never been sure of anything in my entire life, but I understand that I do have to do this. 

"Yes."

I take another deep breath, soaking in the neighborhood for the last time. Each tree, bench, fountain and the square, and patch of lawn where my girlfriend will forever be waiting for me. 

"Michael? Tell Eleanor I love her. Tell her to be strong and patient. We will get through this. Tell her I'll miss everything and I was brought to tears before it happened. Tell her-

My eyes blink open and I feel a salty tear lingering. A woman around my age walks through a wooden door and approaches me. 

"Hi Chidi. I'm Eleanor. Come on in."