Dear Purple Pancakes,

07/29/2019

07/29/2019

Dear Purple Pancakes,

Only you knew how much I loved him, and now he's gone. Really gone, and not in the way that he broke up with me last November, or how he got a new girlfriend not even a month after. He moved away from this small town. The town both him and I grew up in. It's funny how we had never met but, had gone to the same middle and high school. Maybe there was a reason for it, but that reason is long gone.

I don't know how to feel to be honest. I feel nothing right now. Should I be feeling happy because I won't have to see him at work every weekend? Should I be feeling sad because he was my first love? Maybe my heart is tired from feeling so many suffocating emotions. I texted him today after not texting him for months and ignoring him at work. This is how our conversation went:

Me: Hey, I know you are leaving soon. I wish you the best! Please take care!

Him: Thank you so much, I'm actually packing my car right now. Sorry for ignoring you at work, when I finally decided to start saying hi again I could never find you 😂. I wish you the best too have a ughhh good life? Time?
Year? 😂idk

Me: Thank you!

I was told to leave it at that. I wanted to say more but, I should let this chapter close and, let my heart finish gathering up it's last pieces again. My heart will never be complete again, however. I believe a small piece got lost in all the chaos of my first relationship and what happened afterwards. Now, after texting him this one last time I could feel the little piece coming from the other end of the phone. Goodbye, first love. Goodbye, little piece of heart. At least take care of him for me, now that your stuck with him.

-11:11