The Best of Me ( Rickyl )

Chapter 11

*Present*

"Rick, wait." Daryl shouted, jogging after him back towards the cabin until Rick suddenly stopped and turned around causing Daryl to nearly run straight into the back of him.

"You know, after our last conversation at the prison I still went there every day for a month! And then every week for a year, but you never accepted my visits. Did they even tell you that I came?" Rick questioned, resting his hands on his hips as he stared at Daryl.

"They told me." Daryl answered with a small nod and Rick just shook his head in disbelief.

"I guess maybe I hoped they didn't. Do you even know that I went when Lori and I started dating? I told her I was going to see my parents and you didn't want to see me?" Rick questioned, anger lacing his voice.

"That's the only thing I did want." Daryl snapped, before he took a deep breath trying to calm himself down. "I never stopped loving you, Rick. Not once."

"Then why didn't you?" Rick questioned and Daryl shook his head, rubbing his face with his hands.

"Because I... I know this doesn't make sense..." Daryl trailed off unable to get his thoughts into words.

"It doesn't." Rick responded, turning around to walk away, but Daryl quickly grabbed his shoulder and rushed in front of him.

"Rick. Listen to me. I wanted to do somethin' good 'n I wanted to save ya from some of the pain." Daryl tried to explain, but Rick shook his head.

"You didn't save me from anything. I lived with the pain every day of my life, Daryl, and I blame you. I blame you for thinking you knew what was best for me, when it was you that was best for me!" Rick shouted, his voice laced with emotion as he stared at Daryl.

"I couldn't have you wait for me. There was so much you wanted to do with your life-" Daryl began to say before Rick cut him off.

"I wanted to do it with you! And I would have waited for as long as it took." Rick responded, pushing Daryl against his chest, but Daryl barely budged as he stared at Rick with soft eyes.

"I didn't deserve ya, Rick." Daryl muttered.

"Oh, deserve me? Jesus, Daryl. Don't you understand? When Lori and I had Carl, and I know this is wrong, but do you know that when we had him, I wanted to tell you." Rick began to say as he took a shaky breath. "And when I lost Judith... I wanted you to hold me." Rick mumbled, unable to stop the tears from falling down his cheeks and Daryl didn't hesitate as he wrapped Rick up into a tight hug and Rick buried his face in the crook of Daryl's neck.

"And when I was alone at night, I wanted... I wanted you and I cried for you and I hated you and I hated you because..." Rick sobbed, before he pulled away from Daryl's chest as looked him in the eye. "Because I would have chosen you no matter what and you took that away from me." Rick continued, not even bothering to wipe the tears from his eyes as he stared at Daryl.

"I made a mistake-" Daryl started to say.

"Yes, you did. But, see, I still love you." Rick whispered taking a step towards Daryl as the other man immediately pulled him into a tight hug again, kissing the side of Ricks head as Rick wrapped his arms around his body. Neither of them moved for a while as they stood beside the cabin and held each other tightly, neither of them wanting to pull away.

Eventually they did, both of them picking up the empty beer bottles and pizza box from earlier before they made their way into the cabin. Although the outside had been completely overgrown, the inside of the cabin was exactly like how he remembered it.

The sun had long ago disappeared in the sky while they had been outside talking, so while Rick got himself a drink from the kitchen, Daryl walked into the lounge room. He walked over to the fireplace, making sure that it seemed to be in good condition before he started the fire, knowing that nights got cool all the way out here.