UNICAL TALES

I was in 300 level when this incident happened. Attending Night class isn’t just my thing. As appealing as the adulterous UNICAL night class may seem, I chose not to attend since I saw what my principles disapprove. I was a fresher when I made a decision never to attend night classes when I openly witnessed the fornication of students in dark corners of the class. That’s by the way.
I was to write ACC381 the next day. A course that is headed by one strict and ruthless lecturer. My senior colleagues told me that “he no de collect sorting”, so I was majorly on my own. The lecturer himself did very little to cover his course outline. He always comes to the class to tell his ancestors, cock and bull stories and leave. He lectures without direction and explains something like someone that needs the explanation more than us. Moreover, his exams are always hot as hell.
I had up to 15 accounts in the course outline to practice and knew only 7. Friends who volunteered to help all resolved to attend this night and I had no other option than to agree.
We were 5 students that night (3 boys and 2 girls). Well, we practiced very hard until we got tired and slept. I barely slept as I thought about how the exams will be the next day. It was exactly 2:17AM when I got pressed and left the class to ease myself. I stood at one corner and was about to ease myself when I saw shadows at one deserted dark corner behind GSS centre.
“Why those shadows?” I thought
At first, I wanted to leave what I was about to do and run. I was so afraid man!!
As a man wey I be, I decided to pick courage and continue relieving myself from the urine until I received a hot slap on my neck…
“Arghhhhh!!” I screamed
Shock gripped my entire body system. Before I could recover from the shock, I got pulled by my trousers to a darker corner where a light was lit up as soon as I arrived.
“Capon, see this idiot. En de watch as Viper de extricate joy from that shima “ the guy grabbing my trouser shouted
“Oh boy! You be spy now abi? I go knack your head commot! Oya go down!!” another guy angrily shouted
I never understood the terms they used to communicate amongst themselves but I immediately understood what that guy meant by “going down “.  I realized the danger in front of me. They were cultists!
As I slowly wanted to kneel down, one guy aggressively gave me a smack down from my heels and I descended heavily on the ground.
“O boy! Wida you there”, another guy said
“Wetin de your pocket?” One guy asked and searched my pockets and took the last pieces of my old naira notes in total, 900 naira, and my infinix phone.
“So na only N900 you get? Big boy like you” One guy said and gave me another hot slap. That slap seemed to have reset my memory as I could barely even remember anything at all. I had exam that day oh.
They took turns and bullied me as they laughed and mocked me. Continuously calling me a “Jew man”
“See this Jew man! If you like, report us you hear? I know say as you don sabi our faces, you go wan de run your mouth like tap. But see eh, na we de run UNICAL! Any fuck up, we waste you.” One shouted at me and told other guys, “Oya, make we disenbarge!”
I stayed down for a while and frowned. I had bruises all over my face and neck and felt a lot of pains. I tried not to cry but tears couldn’t resist from flowing down my cheeks. With the help of a good Samaritan student, I was able to get up and go back to the class. My mates were still asleep on the desks. I never told them what happened till this moment.
My eyes were wide open till 6AM. I eventually got home, refreshed, wore my clothes and got a cab to the school, trying not to reflect on the incident that happened earlier. I didn’t even remember to eat. SMH…
The exam started by 9AM on the dot. I saw the exam question paper and smiled. It was comprised of 40 Objectives, 10 Subjective, 8 theory questions to answer all and I had prepared for all that recently. My preparations seemed to be enough. It was to last for 3 hours. I immediately picked my ruler, pen and calculator and did the needful. Under approximately 2 hours, I was done. One guy tapped me at the neck and whispered;
“Big boss, abeg na. See as you just de write since and no gree turn answer me. I be your boy oh. I be carryover student and don carry over this course like 3 times. Help me na mbok”
After monitoring the environment and exam supervisors, I turned towards the guy. I became shocked.  This was the capon that had dealt with me earlier on and took all me money. I gave him a stern look and turned forward. He seemed shocked too.
“Boss abeg no vex. You know say na circumstance bend crayfish. Mbok, if I fail this time, I no  go graduate and dem no de sort this man. This na core departmental course “ He said.
“Oya big boss, sorry. See eh, just begin de return all the slaps wey I bin give you. I swear. I fuck up bad bad” He continued
He seemed apologetic. I seemed not to give in to his demands at first, but later changed my stance.  My moral principle has always been to help people and never expect any thing back in return as well as forgive people no matter how bad they hurt me. There is a reason why I forgive people but never speak to them no matter how hard they try... I agreed, took his paper and answered like 6/8 theory questions and all his multiple choice questions within the short time left. All th fool had written is his name and matric number. Who does that?
After exam that day, Other of his gang were waiting for him at the entrance of PAV2A as we moved out of the hall. Our eyes met as I tried to avoid more eye contact. The Capon narrated what had happened to his guys as they approached me  in a tight corner
“My guy, you do well” One of the guys said
Another said; “That your money wey we collect, we go return 5K give you now now now. Even your phone too.”
After much pleadings, I rejected the money offer and just took my phone. I had my reasons.
Another guy said; “You see eh, you be really good guy. Na we de run things for the UNICAL so. Any soul wey touch you, just flash me. Any girl wey you like na your own. As long as say she de Calabar, na point and kill be that. Even if she de UNILAG, UNIPORT, UNIUYO, ESUTH, UNN, ABSU, CRUTECH and any other Uni, we get links wey go work am for us. Just holla us. You get?”
I just smiled and nodded. We later exchanged contact but I never called them. It’s just a “status viewer” relationship and “my-guy-my-guy-my-guy” relationship we de keep till date. Well, I ended up with an Alpha(A) in that course with that cultist guy, bagging a B grade.
I was fortunate enough to meet one of those guys in SPAR when I went for shopping last week. He willingly opened up to me on the reasons he joined cultism and his regrets. I realized  that he was beaten just like me and decided to join the Cult to take revenge. He ended by saying;
“You be the only person wey I don tell this thing. Just help me exit this thing if you fit”
I just smiled and nodded.
My friends, Do not repay evil with evil. Always do good at all times. Cultism isn’t that answer and will never be! Totally abstain from all acts! Keep your slates clean and you’ll surely make it in UNICAL.