Idea # 1 (When will you believe?)

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You asked whether I to live in a world of crookedness and hate or to stay and live with you?

Nay! Nay I say! For it is only the same.
For you will only cheat and deceit me with your shameful habits.

And now you say that you have come to tell me that I should stay, saying you have still hold this feelings you called "love", true in your heart?

Well I say! Keep the riffraff you call your  feelings out! Out of your heart I say!

For I do not need you. For I do not want you. For you are my misery and my burden that I can happily live without.

Though I shall admit, I will miss the days when we are still happy, the days we shared our feelings, our love and affections through hugs and kisses to gentle stares and passionate caresses, even if some were one-sided.

For once, I thought I would know what true love feels like but then I was fooled by you and your damn lies.

The moment I left, the moment I cried is when I realized how happy and free to be away from you and your sin.

Yet this sin you had is the reason why I loved you. It's dangerous yet it captivated me like an insect seeing the blue fluorescent light, it lured me in like how a hunter lured his catch.

But that was then.

Those sins you've showed me made me realized how weak I was, how pathetic I was and how I relied to your power when I lost myself and you knew yet you still took advantage of it but then that time I didn't mind it because you were my confidant, my strength and my lover.

When you gave me your strength, I was dependant on you but did I love you? I did. Or was it your power that I fallen in love with? Maybe at first but I started to love your ways like it was intoxicating me.

Your gentle yet rough touch felt like heaven above and your pleasing voice made me addicted to you and how I longed to hear you say my name. I had fallen madly in love with you.

However, it hit me.

I wasn't enough for you, was I? You went and seek others saying they are just your playthings but I knew better! You told them the same things when it comes to me and to the others!

When I left you, it made you angry. When I came back, it made you happy that you cried.
When you said "I love you", it made me happy then but why not now?

I accepted you wholeheartedly when no one can. I treated the way you want people to treat you even before. Even when I didn't know you fully. Even the days when I was still pretending...

Yet you say that I wasn't enough, that I wanted something else.

Why can't you see? Something changed between the both of us.

Something changed in me. Something good.

I tried to tell you. I tried to act it out. I tried so much but the more I tried, the more it hurts me that you think it's all fake.

I'm sorry I left you alone but maybe then will you realized it even if I said "I love you" now, it is never the same when I told you that before.

Just when will you believe me?

You're evil for making me become a vile person in people's eyes, just for you to love me. You're evil for making me hate you when I really, really...

loved you

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