Heart of Ash (The Dark Arcane Series: Book 1)

Chapter Thirty Six

Ashyn wouldn't have been surprised to learn that it took the others several extended moments to notice her disappearance after she vanished. But it wasn't for a lack of care towards her, as she would have wrongly assumed, but simply because their attention had already been captured by the Ender.

He stood up, fighting to straighten his shoulders. He was still their leader, he reminded himself, and they were still his friends. They wouldn't think any different of him, he tried to reassure himself.

The cold northern air was biting against his skin, a cruel reminder of his mask that lay torn on the ground. He knew what chaos lay plain on his face, and the hideous distorted features that came with it. The corner of his top lip was nonexistent—thanks to the scars—and his one good eye was too large, and part of his brown hair had been seared away.

He wished—oh Mothers, did he wish—that he could have the confidence to go without the mask—to be unashamed like Kade would have been if their places were switched but he didn't, he couldn't.

What was Conan's face showing? Was he disgusted? He did not want to find out.

He turned towards the one person he'd planned to eventually show his face to, but couldn't bring himself to meet his eyes, Kade. "Mask, please."

"Of course," he responded, face crumpled with understanding, and handed it to him. "Oh, no, it's—I'm so sorry."

The mask had been shredded. Several parallel lines had sliced through it, rendering it useless. It more closely resembled a tangle of ribbons than a mask.

The Ender swallowed.

He placed the mask down gently on the floor, and looked at his friends. He thought his hands might have been shaking—but no, they couldn't be. He was the Ender; his hands simply didn't shake, not anymore.

And yet, he felt seconds away from breaking down entirely.

"Wait," he said, confused as he surveyed the people before him. "Where's Ashyn?"

They twisted round to where she had previously been standing behind them.

"Is she—did she get injured?" Sariem went to search amongst the two dead bodies.

He thought although it wasn't unlikely she had just snuck off in the shadows, it was still odd. Out of everyone, she had seemed most determinedly curious to know what his face looked like, and now that she had the chance—she was gone.

"No, I was with her the whole time, she was here two moments ago," king Yeona insisted.

"Maybe she's just gone to gather her thoughts, we did just fight people who could turn into wolves. It's kind of overwhelming," Conan suggested, voice still thick with disbelief.

Ender turned further away from him.

"Since when have we ever known Ashyn to be overwhelmed by anything?" Kade shot him down, frowning.

"Hey guys, I think I—I think I might need a healer over here," Nala laughed faintly as she collapsed. Conan only just managed to catch her head before she hit the ground.

"Nala!" Kade shouted, skidding over the undergrowth to get to her.

The Ender jumped to her side too, painfully aware of his exposed face. A quick glance told him she had a serious bite on her lower arm, and a deep gash in her calf. Mother of ash... it was a wonder she had remained standing for so long.

"Ender, how's she going to be?" They looked towards him.

He bent over Nala's bony slip of a figure. The question went unanswered.