Begin Again ✔

A day, rain falls to the ground, is a day where my tears will soon follow the tracks on my cheek. My hearts shattered, broken, barely beating as I sit here glancing out the grand open windows. He broke my heart, he throws it away without ever looking back, I’d tried so hard, put all my time and life in a relationship which was never going to work. There would be the days where he calls me up and say he loves me, the others would be when he broke up with me. Back and forward that’s all that we ever were a messed up love relationship.

So as I sit there staring at my reflection, a tear falls down my face. The thick blanket wrapped around my shoulders, my legs pull to my close to my chest. Its that moment that I came to the conclusion that I need to go on that date, a friendly date that’s I'd agreed, he’s charming and sweet.

I slide off the sofa and wander into my bedroom. The rooms a mess, with makeup and clothes alike scattered across the wooden floor. My bed covers hanging slightly off the bed, one of my pillows on the floor, one on the middle of the bed, another against the headboard and the last creating a bridge to the bedside table. I step around the clothes and reach my wardrobe, my eyes wander over my clothes, and my eyes land on a vintage-style white dress, it has a black belt to match around its middle. I pull out the dress and once sliding off my sweats I pull it on. My make-up table is a couple of feet away, but I pick up the clothes on the floor, piling them up in the corner, creating space for me to walk. I sit down on the seat and look to see a ghostly figure staring back at me. My hairs mattered, with knots, as the blond curly which once would hand loosely around my shoulders, were no longer there, but now my hair's in a mess .

My eyes, no longer in focus , as I choose that time to lean forward and grab my hair brush. My brush struggles with my hair, as it attempts to go through my hair, demonstrating how much pain I’ve been through, over the past few months. Once I’m able to control my hair, I grab the straightens and slowly begin to let the heat smoothes it all out. Once I look back at my reflection, I see the girl I lost all those months ago; I give myself a smile to encourage myself and let my hand reach to the draws, which hold the many wonders of make-up. I let my hands find the lipstick, the mascara, the eye shadow as well as the eyeliner and of course foundation. I let the brushes past over my skin and once making a pop sound, I stood up to grab a pair of shoes, placing them on my feet.

I grab my headphone and once slipping them on, I turn my attention to the mirror. I take a deep breath and my eyes flicker to the black high heels I’m wearing. The corners of my lips turn up as I hear the low, soft beat of the drums from my ear phones. I walk out the house and lock the door behind me. I walk down to the street and get into my car, humming to the song playing in my ears. Once I’m in my car, I place my iPod next to me and begin to drive. My eyes stay on the road as I pick up in speed. My heartbeat is increasing in speed, every second that has passed me.

Pulling into the parking lot, my heart and mind are both racing. I sit there for a minute or so, scared that I’ll be waiting for someone who will never come. I’ll be there all alone because he doesn’t want to come. Who would want me, I’m very unpredictable with my relationships, and they never seem to last, but here I am, going on my first date in eight months.

My eyes flicker to my reflection in the mirror. My red lipstick is still intact; my eye lashes full and long. My cheeks, holding a healthy red glow and its that moment that I slip out of my car. I look at the small café across the street from me. He won’t be here, who would turn up early for me, and I’m just a lost girl. My feet move off the sidewalk as I make my way to the door of the café, taking a deep breath I push it slightly open, reviling a small, half-empty room. The light shines in through the windows on the opposite of the room. The tables and chairs, as well as the floor, they're made of wood. My hells tap, gently against the wooden floor.

That’s when I see him there, I see you waving at me and once I take a deep breath I walk over. I smile at him as he holds out the chair for me, not knowing how nice that is for me. My eyes look for him and his dark reddish-brown hair that’s flipped to the side of his freckled face. His green eyes sparkle, as I feel my heartbeat increase in speed. He presses his lips to my hand, gently kissing it.

‘Bianca, you look simply beautiful.’ He says, before taking the seat from across the table from me. I give him a weak smile, scare to speak in case the tears follow, making a mark on my cheek. I’m coming off a little shy, and I know you don’t know why.

‘Thanks, you don’t look bad yourself.’ I say, trying to break the ice. His eyes trace over me, as the waitress comes to us, and standing to the left of me, she takes our order. Two coffees’, that’s what we ask for and once receiving a horrible glare from her I turn my attention back to the man across the table from me.

‘Bianca, you just need to relax. It’s funny seeing you so shy.' He whispers to me, I give him a smile. My eyes flicker to him.

‘Sorry, Luke I’m just a little nervous.’ I say, just as our drinks, place on the table. I pick up the coffee and place it to my lip. Once I place it back on the table, Luke lets out a little laugh. He throws his head back and it makes me think of a small child. I use the napkin to wipe the foam from my mouth. The corners of his lips turn, making his face go into a smile. I look through my lashes and he’s staring at me, not with hate, not with annoyance, but he almost looks happy. He’s laughing and that just makes me smile. He reminds me of the broken relationship I left all those months ago.

Our chatter picks up, and we share stories of when we were once so little. His smile never seems to fall, and neither does mine. My eyes locked with his, scared that if I look away he'll leave me, sitting here. My heartbeat has gone to a steady pace and I let my fingers slowly tap on the table beneath me. I watch him, as he talks and the smile on my face, just doesn’t go. Here now, I feel my mind and body can relax.

We drink and walk my mind and heart, racing alike, while my eyes on him, as I listened to every word he says, the smile on my face, didn’t want to disappear. His voice, alone was enough to take the pain away, and here I feel a new taste of romance, the kind of feel that you get when you come across romance for the first time. The same, shy feeling you get going on your first date, the same looks and feeling of uncertainly.

Once we're done, Luke holds out his hand for me to take, and he helps me get to my feet and I feel his breath against my cheek, as my eyes follow him and he holds his hand out, so that I lead the way. We walk on to the street and my eyes, again lock with his. I find my fingers entwining with his, as we take, one slow step at a time.

I bite on my lip, scared that I’ll blurt out his name, damaging this perfect moment. A car passes us, and at that moment my eyes go to Luke’s face, and it's when he pulls me close, and he says.

‘Bianca stop being so, freaking shy.’ I smile at his touch and my eyes go to his hands which are holding on to mine. ‘See there’s your beautiful smile.’ I blush at his comment. He holds me to his side and we continue our journey down the street. My eyes flicker to him every few seconds and when our eyes lock I feel my face blush with color. We arrive at my car and I unlock it, Luke holds the door open for me. ‘See you soon. I’ll call you tomorrow.’ I nod my head and slide into the car. He bends down, and through the open window, he presses his lips to my cheek. The soft touch makes my face grow into a smile, once more.

He walks away and after that, but right here on this Wednesday afternoon, my life can begin again.

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So, I went to the doctor today, turn out I have a virus in my thoat-toatally weird, but it means I'm stll sick and medication is not going to work. So I'm stocking up on Lockes and Soothers and maybe I'll get better soon, or not. Anyways I've been writing a lot and I wrote this story over the last week. Anyone who knows me, knows I love Taylor and her abums out in less tha a month. Anyways every Monday till her album s relased she's peviewing a song and then releasing it on Tuesday. There's four in total and the first one is calld Begin Again, hence the title of the story- I know if I really thought abut I could write a longer story, but this felt fine.

Bianca is played by Taylor, is in the beautiful cover and deadication to the maker I can't get over how much I love it.

Luke is played by Will Anderson- who's the lead singer of parachutes- who's one of my favorite bands, there song white dress is about Taylor. I also beileve that Will is the guy she goes on a date with and that the song Begin Again is about because I know they went on a date togeter and they are good friends.