101 Ways to Skin a Hoodie

Chapter 11

"Move it, inmate!"

A voice behind me yells into my ear. I can feel hot breath on the back of my neck. A boot is shoved into my back and I stagger forward, which is a difficult feat with the shackles around my... feet. I can't see anything except my hands in front of me, which are cuffed in steel. A pack of what feels like gravel is on my back. I walk forward, not knowing my destination, and not really caring. It's much easier to not think about these things.

I walk and walk and walk and walk. For an eternity I walk, never stopping, never looking back. Never looking forward for that matter. An eternity is much longer than it seems. Which sounds silly, for when one thinks of eternity they'll think of something infinite, like the expanding universe. Or if they're more knowledgeable they'll think of Grimm's The Shepherd Boy or another similar story of the like which serves as an apt metaphor for an eternity.

Neither of these things truly exemplify what it is like to walk for an eternity. That's not the fault of the purporter of the answer, it's simply impossible for the human mind to fathom how long an eternity really is. I'll try to make my experience just a little bit digestible though.

As I've discussed before, an unladen human can walk for a very long time. However for reasons unbeknownst to me I had a pack of gravel on my back, and as one would expect this makes things considerably more difficult. Within the first few miles my legs were already getting sore, but it was only after the first few years had passed that I began to question my own humanity. There's no way that a person should be able to walk this long under these conditions without rest. I would falter and stagnate sometimes along the way, but these instances were always swiftly stopped by the boot jabbing into the square of my back, forcing me onward.

Eternity. Forward and forward, longer and longer. I never even got the levity of sleepwalking, for I never grew tired, nor famished, nor parched. I think it was after the first century or so that I stopped thinking. I can't describe what it's like. To go on for so long that the easiest choice is to stop thinking, even while your body retains its autonomy.

I do apologise if I haven't been clear as to what it's like to experience an eternity, however as I said before, it's truly impossible for the human mind to grasp the full scope of the experience. For you, it may seem like reading this section is an eternity in and of itself. I can assure that it's not, even though I sympathize with the sentiment.

Lastly, you may wonder why I'm referring to this whole ordeal in past tense, and with a particularly meta tone. Well, truth be told I began thinking all of this to myself in a mere moment, and this is simply the easiest way for me to think of it myself. Now, allow me to recant the experience I had in the moments before I began my narration:

"SURPRISE!" A shadowy figure pops into my face. I'm not surprised. I would be, if I had been conscious of my own existence up until this point. Now that I am I notice that my body is past the point of pain; it seems that my brain has decided that it's easier to convey the amount of stress I'm under with a simple ache throughout my bones.

"Oh, you look tired. Here, let me get those for you." The steel around my wrists turns to ash, along with the shackles around my feet. I feel the gravel on my back melt away into the air and I collapse to the ground.

"Did you really think I would make you go forever? How trite. I'm not so cruel. Besides, the novelty of it wore off long ago, even if it was only a few minutes for me. I'd ask you what it was like, but both you and I know deep down that I already know. If you really want to share our tales in a cutesy slumber party of sorts then you'll have the chance to soon enough. In the meantime, why don't you 'wake up.' Here, I'll even give you a little help."