Sparks in You

Have you ever woke up from your sleep crying?

Crying from something you know won't be yours.

Something you desperately wants but can't afford.

Something that is far away from your reach.

Something that doesn't even know you exist.

Something that impossible to be yours.

Something that make you cry every night.

Something that you doesn't have a chance.

Something that belong to someone.

Love is not exist. Is all you need to know. But yet, you dare yourself to get in one of those ridiculous relationship. You doesn't understand what it's truly mean. Yet you claim you know everything.

....................

Birds chirping in the morning wakes me up from my sleep. As I slowly sitting down on my bed, I could feel. My cheeks wet from my tears.

"I could not see him"

Is all I thought as I wipe my tears. I got up from my bed and went to my full length mirror. Looking at a fragile figure with messy hair. I started to brush my hair.

"And again you cry for a damn guy who doesn't even know you!"

I say out loud to myself. I let out a deep sigh and went to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready to work.

Today, I have a meeting with the management team regarding the upcoming project that has been created by our client. The project was rejected but Mr. Desmun has faith in it and decided to continue the project. He gave it all to me to decided and leading the project.

At first, I accepted it. But now, I regret it. It seems like I didn't do any progress. But I did. After finish discussing with the management, Ms. Pete told me to take over the meeting with Jake Paul's real estate. I've done it. After that, when I was about to go back home, I forget one thing.

The project Mr. Desmun asked me to lead. The proposal, funds, and  client list must be send tomorrow. I grew frustrated to myself and decides that I will do it at home. But one thing for sure I don't forget is him.

I could not stop thinking about him. Why? He makes me cry every night. He makes me confused. I cry a lot this past few weeks. Because of him. When I think I'm immune to the sparks, I fall even deeper than before.

Deeper that it hurts myself.

"what is wrong with you? Why do you cry?"

"I must be stressed from my work. This doesn't have anything to do with him"

"I don't know if I was stressed because of my work or you"

"Could you please stop coming in my head?"

"Why do you cry for a guy? Don't be ridiculous"

"I was just stress. He doesn't have anything to do with it!"

All the words to reassure myself. I keep myself compose. I do not want to lose my ego. I do not fall in love with him.