Maybe one day ill feel the sun on my skin again, Ill let the warmth wrap me up, and hit every ounce of my soul and not have to wonder why it doesnt feel the same.
I think about how happy I was when I was young, so care free like I had it all. because hapiness is truly having it all.
Now I look up at the sky or the trees and I feel a glimpse of that hapiness. it taunts me.
like I can reach out and touch its that close. but yet so far away
when I look up at the fluffy clouds on a sunny day I wonder "Is heaven real? Are all the beautiful souls ive met in my life still gonna be around when their heart doesnt beat and the memeories start to fade.
will I ever feel the love again? so unconditionally.
will I ever love mysef again so forginvingly
I wanna feel the way I felt before this storm but I just cant stop the rain.
I know maybe I will find it again someday but that doesnt stop me from wondering in the moments of today.
i wanna feel like myself again.
The one who didnt need to chase anything to feel fine. no drugs no booze, no fake smiles
And everyone seems to have it together but me.
I know I want to succeed but id rather lay in bed becouse "ill do it tommorw" and I say that everyday.
But it seems that as soon as the rainbow comes out, and I see the beauty in the pain, lighting hits my soul and wrings it out and deep depression takes its place