Entry 1
I’m at camp for whatever this camp is about, they said is was for basketball but it’s day four and we haven’t even mentioned basketball so I think I might have gotten on the wrong bus or something. Anyways my roommates and I are walking back to our cabin hungry because the guys in front of couldn’t decide wether to have chocolate or white milk and this discussion that they had lasted all of lunch. So we’re walking back to cabin and one of my roommates, Phil, goes, “Did you know that chocolate milk comes from brown cows and white come from white cows.”
So we all looked over at him with a look that says you seriously believe that, except for this other guy, Joe, who believed him. So I said, “No it doesn’t.”
He then preceded to say, “Oh, well thats what my friends told.”
I responded by rolling my eyes.
Entry 2
I won an around the world trip at “basketball” camp. First we’re going to Japan and we’ll be there for three days. After that we’re going to Hawaii for four days. Then we’ll go to Panama for two days. Afterwords we’re heading to Spain for five days. Im really looking foreword to Japan. I plan on getting a pen computer while we’re their. In Hawaii I’m going to take surfing lessons and that’ll be fun. In Panama I’m going to catch a lizard and bring it home with me. Finally, in Spain i’m not sure what i’m going to do.
Entry 3
So I won a radio contest while I was on an around the world trip that I also won. I get to spend the night at the haunted Winchester mansion. I was like cool that’ll be fun. So here I am in this house that is so big, half of it is roped off so I don’t get lost and I still half 80 rooms to myself. At three AM I got up for a snack and I see this guy walk up to me wearing a bed sheet and yelling “BOoOoOoO! I am the ghost of this house,” towards me.
So I took off the bed sheet and he doesn’t have a head so I put the bed sheet back on and told him good night. I went to the fridge ate a piece of pizza and started off back towards my room. On the way back I passed him again and he yelled “GoOoOoOoOd night.”
Entry 4
My friend the bed-sheet ghost gave me a ton of money so I’m using it on genetic research. Particularly gene splicing. I have decided to make the ultimate predator that will lie dormant until the apocalypse where we will release them and have them take over as the next dominant species. Im going to give it the mind of a human, the silent wings of an owl, the eyes of an eagle, the strength of an elephant, the amphibiousness of an amphibian, the claws of a lion, the teeth of a great white shark, the speed of a cheetah on land, the speed of a sailfish in water, the speed of a peregrine falcon in the air, and the size of a human. I shall call it epic. It would live everywhere.
Entry 5
Due to my work on the epic I get to dine with Neal Armstrong using a time machine. We talked about the rocket he flew in. We talked about what the moon feels like. We also talked about zero gravity. We talked about his hobbies and what he wanted to be when he was a kid. It was a lawyer.
Entry 6
When I was time traveling I “accidentally” created a paradox that involves me winning the lottery and Obama having a second head but thats not important. With my new found money I bought Game stop but due to another paradox (that I may or may not talk about later) it turned into Wal-mart which is way better but more expensive. Or it would be but I bought it for the price of Game stop. So now Im the owner of Wal-mart, and can get almost anything out of it for free. Also Obama’s second head is way smarter than he is and is doing a better job than he originally was at running the country.
Entry 7
So its Halloween and I sold Wal-mart for tons of money and then proceeded to spend it all on candy and video games. Plus its also that time of the week (aka Wednesday) where something weird and unusual happens so I went on a walk. When I was about half way down the side walk a floating skeleton head popped out of no where and went “Give me Wal-mart or I will show you your worst fear that is Halloween related for example vampires or whatever!” At this point I know he’s a weirdo so I told him the truth that I didn’t own Wal-mart anymore. “Lies will not be tolerated!” he yelled. All of a sudden a black space surrounded me and he yells, “Face your worst Halloween fear!” So we where just sitting their waiting for a few hours and eventually I got bored and he had surprised look on his face so I used my mind to create a door, opened it and walked out.
Entry 8
I have somehow inexplicably turned into a giraffe probably by the skull faced guy who thought I still owned Wal-mart. Any ways I was just sitting there eating leaves minding my own business, as most giraffes do, and I heard this noise. I turned around and saw that it was a lioness chasing zebras. I then decided why not, ran up to the lioness and kicked her right in the face. Now I know what your thinking Giraffes don’t fight lions but I did and I’m awesome so I win.
Entry 9
I was out exploring after I turned back from a giraffe which was fun, other than the whole craving for leaves thing. Well, anyways, I kicked this tree that I saw because the leaf cravings haven’t quite gone away yet, and the tree was hollow. So I looked around and I found a door. You wouldn’t believe how big it was! There was a whole library inside of this tree! So I walked up to one of the shelves and picked up the book Moby Dick, because I’ve always been curious about it, and started reading. Before I knew it I had been sucked into the book. I realized that I was falling into an ocean and assumed a diving position. My dive was cut short though because a giant white whale, presumably Moby Dick, jumped out of the water and ate me! I then shot right out of the book! So much for that adventure.
