Rid the People

Chapter 6

Cassidy let out an exasperated sigh.

The warm water ran through her thick hair as she inhaled sharply and pulled her fingers through it, attempting to detangle the mess. It was like wet straw, except it braided itself in various loops and tiny, knotted balls.

She tilted her head back further. The warmth relaxed her muscles for long enough that her back had lost it's arch and she was now leaning forward, closing her eyes. She allowed herself to get lost in the steam that swam around her, blurring her surroundings, wrapping around her like a warm burrito on a winters day.

And though the shower was comforting, being alone consumed her. It made her feel a wallowing sadness: an empty, heart-thumping anxiety that started first in the pit of her stomach, then to her chest. She felt nauseous. With one arm against the wet tiled wall, she bowed her head and sobbed.

Not only did the thoughts of never seeing her mum again bombard her, but the aching in her fingers reminded her of the knife cracking into the shopkeepers skull, the silence that came after his energy left him, his life swimming away from his eyes.

Cassidy rubbed her wrist, massaging her fingers together as she watched the dried blood thinly run from her body. She couldn't stop them from shaking. She couldn't stop her eyes from running with fresh, wounded tears.

After she washed herself and detangled her hair with her fingers, she stepped out of the shower. She craved being back with Lizzie, back with Dan, back with those she had just met. Being around people distracted her enough that she didn't have to think about what had happened, only what must happen next, looking to survive.

She looked over at the pile of clothes Esme gathered for her, neatly stacked atop the closed toilet seat. She unfolded the top first; a black vest top. Beneath it was an oversized grey hoodie, paired with some stretchy black jeans and thick socks. She also folded a spare pair of shorts and an unopened pack of underwear. Cassidy felt relieved at her choice of clothing, perfect for a chilly start to the English spring, enough to keep her going through summer. She'd have to find a way to wash her underwear. Perhaps in Matthew and Sam's apartment? If this flat had running water, then they would, surely?

Cassidy dried herself and got changed, trying not to overthink what it will be like to be homeless. How many miles would it take to walk back to Lizzie's house? Now they knew of the danger, the prospect seemed worth facing. They could clear anyone who was there out. They could lock every door and close all the curtains. They could hide until Lizzie's parents came back in their car.

The trousers were slightly tight around her waist, having a natural curve compared to Esme's slim frame, but it was fitted enough. It felt good to be in something clean, at least. The rest of the clothes fit snugly and the hoodie was thick, evidently expensive. Cassidy rummaged through the bathroom and pulled out some deodorant. She used as much as she could without being disrespectful, closing the cupboard door with a quiet tap.

She departed the bathroom with dripping hair, holding her dirty clothes in a heaped pile in her arms. She walked into the living area where everyone quietly spoke, feeling relieved that her wet eyelashes hid the fact that she was crying.

"Lizzie, your turn," Cassidy mumbled awkwardly, taking her backpack from the seat beside Dan.

Esme showed Lizzie the way with a heaped pile of clothes in her arms. Cassidy watched them leave the room, before turning around and stuffing her dirty outfit, as well as her summer clothes, into her backpack.

It didn't fit. The shorts bulked out and took up any room she had for anything else. She sighed and roughly pulled it all back out, frustrated.

"Your eyes are red," Dan said quietly, so no one else would hear. He leaned towards her, frowning in concern. "Are you ok?"