Random Short Stories

I'm Broken

(A/N warning this chapter contains mentions of suicide, abuse, drugs, alcohol abuse, and PTSD. If you get triggered by any of these topics or are very easily disgusted please avoid this chapter. You've been warned. Once again this chapter contains mentions of suicide, abuse, drugs, alcohol abuse, and PTSD.)

To: Whoever is reading

It's been confirmed. I'm officially broken. Well, my heart and soul are, so you can't tell to say the least. I may not look like I'm broken but I am. Physically, no. Mentally, yes.

My parents have become the biggest assholes to ever walk the earth. They have broken me and my sister. Because of them, I have scars that need to be hidden under long sleeve black shirts, hoodies, and pants. Our mother became an alcoholic who would hit us with empty bottles of Vodka. While our father became a drug addict that abused heroin and stabbed us with used needles.

I wear a mask to hide my sadness. But just underneath is a terrified boy who clings to his pillow and cries himself to sleep because his parents hate him. I have to protect my sister since she is also broken and suffers from PTSD. While I suffer from depression, anxiety, and anorexia. My sister is broken because she can't walk properly.

She gets abused mentally, verbally, and physically. If someone yells at or touches her she starts thinking about how our parents would yell at her for being "useless" and beating her for dropping a plate or a bowl. Once I tried to hug her and she started crying since our parents would whip her. I even told her that I was going to hug her. I try to help her cope with being touched.

My sister goes to therapy just to talk with someone so she can feel safe. I go to therapy as well but I take meds as well and it doesn't help at all. I had a panic attack in History once because my teacher forced me to "learn" about past torture methods and punishments. I sometimes have them at home when our parents are arguing and shit.

Sometimes mother is too drunk to notice us getting abused by father since she has passed out or too drunk to do it herself. Father practically rapes his own daughter since his wife won't fuck him and his mistress left his sorry ass. Then mom gets mad at my sister for always getting his attention. Since I'm too much of a bitch to say it I always think it 'well if you would fuck him she wouldn't get his attention. She even wants to kill herself because of you two." They don't listen to anything we have to say anyway.

I even thought about suicide but, I can't leave my sister behind with those assholes. She would be heartbroken or devastated or maybe want to kill herself to end her misery. I once wanted to steal my dad's gun and just shoot myself in the head. I even thought about taking my mom's pocket knife to cut my wrist while sitting in a bathtub. But I never did those things because of my sister.

You know what, fuck it. I'm dead by the time whoever finds and is reading this letter. Ever since our grandparents died on both sides and our aunts and uncles gave up on our parents, we've fallen apart. I kept telling myself 'Things are going to get better after that day', yet they haven't. Nothing was going to change, nothing has changed and nothing will ever change.

To my parents Alice and Richard. The two of you were complete assholes to us and can die in hell. My beloved sister, Celina. I will always love you and will be watching over you. Stay positive and think happy thoughts always. Don't let what happened in our past get to you and bring you down.

Yes, my deck decision was suicide. Now I can be with our grandparents. Celina, I know you will join me in a month or so. This is not goodbye. Think of this as freedom from the hell we were raised in. I'm free now and soon you will be as well, Celina.

-Sincerely, Jason

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This is the second chapter.  I apologize if you were alarmed by this chapter because of the topic.  But if you weren't then I'm glad. I also know you guys are thinking that this isn't the type of topic I would write about. So an explanation is that people suffer from being suicidal or having suicidal thoughts. As well as getting abused by people that "love" them and get PTSD from those events. Maybe even being abused for having a mental condition. If any of you know someone that is going through this or is struggling please support them through everything no matter what happened in their life.  Just support them it makes their day even if it's been shitty. I love you guys and always keep your head up. Till next time my little Villain's.
-Anime lover