distant dreams

what rain feels like. corporate sustainability.

(Image doesn't belong to me. I got it from Pinterest. duh.)

Everyone is talking about sustainability. Of being responsible. It is becoming trendy to support metal straws, reusable bags, and recycled fashion.

I was buying another cup of pearl milk tea (0% sugar, no ice because I try too hard) when my father said "Be careful. Some girl in America fell down while drinking from a metal straw."

Puncture wound. Even the straws are guns in the fabled land of freedom. Sorry for your loss.

I bought some snacks at K-Mart and received a reusable bag as a free gift. A reward for overspending on banana milk and sweet potato chips (again, because I try too hard). It's shaped and coloured like a strawberry and when you loosen the click fastener the tote unfolds. I stuffed it in my bag for fun when my parents and I went grocery shopping.

I saved them exactly RM 1.00 worth of plastic bags. That is one-fifth of an English pound. Better than nothing. Oh, I also bought a durian crepe. It was overpriced. Apparently the new durian craze is because there are more tourists in Malaysia now. Cadbury even mixed it with chocolate.

I remind myself of Willy Loman (from that play. He commits suicide by crashing his car into a tree after failing to plant carrots.) sometimes. Contradicting myself every other sentence - swear I'm not trying too hard now.

My body is a temple. I put a lot of iced americano in it.

Call me self-obsessed but when I reread the previous chapters I cringe at myself even more. It is raining outside and I sneeze in even numbers. Tried to find anime to get into but nothing struck my fancy. My head is too far up into the clouds, yet my ankles are firmly anchored to the ground by ropes I knotted myself. There are so many good songs already so what is it am I looking for?

My childhood friend (one of two, which is two more than I had expected) told me to listen to Lana Del Ray's new album. So I am doing it now. She croons into my ear canal, the piano chords tumbling down after her, and I must admit - I like it too.

"Norman fucking Rockwell". Maybe it's the rain.

My other friends are my parents. I love them so much. I don't show it enough properly. But I love making them laugh. Isn't that what friendship does to you?

How was your week? Mine was okay. I will sign off so we feel like we are writing letters to each other, where my words are unrequited, met only with silence and a comforting denial of either approval or rejection.

Oh yeah, I recently took a short trip to China. Somewhere in China. Very sunny over there, but in a few weeks the blue will set in, and everybody will begin to bundle up. The hotel had a really luxurious breakfast spread.

Hope you don't reply.

With all my troubles,
AURA.