Picked From The Crowd

Chapter 2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K59KsIDlif8&feature=youtube_gdata_player

__________________________

I wake up suddenly, sitting up with a start. I'm sweating all over, and shivering out of control. My cat Sasha is lying on my legs, stretching out to her full length. I feel the pressure of her on me, and slowly try to shift out from under her. I wake her, against my best efforts, and she raises her head and looked at me with disgust. I needed to get up though. I slip out from under the covers and glance at my clock. 4:57 AM.

I walk across my room and open the door. I hear my mom and sister, quietly snoring from their rooms. My dad must not be home yet. I sneakily walk down my stairs and turn the corner into the kitchen. It's completely pitch black, and I can't see anything. I run my hand along the wall until I find the switch. The bright light blinds me as I step toward the cupboard, pull out a glass and fill it with water. I turn off the light and stumble my way back up the stairs. I turn on the light beside my bed and take out my notebook. I stare at it for minutes upon minutes, trying to hear the music in my head. Writing songs always calms me down when my heart is racing. I write songs about pretty much anything, and in pretty much any genre. I use songs to express myself, and I always have something to write about. My life is nowhere near perfect. My dad is an alcoholic, and is always yelling. I have never heard my dad say love, ever. He has recently started to hit my mom, never in front of me or my 6 year old sister, but you can see the bruises and cuts on my mom's face and body, and I know that's it's not because she fell. Thank God Julie is too young to realise what's going on, but me being 18, and hearing the kinds of things he says to my mom and I, I know perfectly well what's going on. We never talk to each other anymore, even though we are living in the same house. I can't even remember the last time we had a conversation.

I realise that my father is the one I need to write this song about. My pen hits paper, and the lyrics start to flow,

"Oh father,

Please bother

I'd love to leave you alone

But I can't let you go

Oh father

Please honour

Put the bottle down

For the love of a daughter"

The tears start to flow from my eyes, but I continue,

"Don't you remember

I'm your baby girl

How could you push me out of your world

Lie to your flesh and your blood

Put your hands on the ones that you swore you loved

Don't you remember

I'm your baby girl

How could you throw me right out of your world

So young when the pain had begun

Now forever afraid of being loved"

I put down my pen and just let myself cry. I needed this. I have kept this in for so long my stomach constantly hurt and I always had a headache. I hated my dad. I am going to finish my last year of high school, and then I'm leaving. And I'm bringing my little sister with me. I won't make her go through what I have and know what I know, it's not right. I am going to leave with her and never come back. I take another drink of water and get up, leaving my songbook behind. I go to my bathroom and turn on the hot water. I stand in the shower, letting the hot water run over my body, and letting it wash all the worries and pain out of my body, taking them down the drain with it. I step out, exposing myself to the cold morning air. I get dressed and plug in my curling iron. I line my bright blue eyes with black eyeliner, although the are already lined red from the tears. I start to curl my light blonde hair, in ringlets as perfect as I can get them. I spray them with hairspray, and look them over in my mirror, still steamed up from my shower. I open my little sisters door, and walk over to her bed. I lightly shake her to wake her, and she groggily stares up at me, "Stephie?" She rolls over, obviously not wanting to wake up.

"Come on baby, you need to go to school. Mrs.Travis, will be mad if you don't show up today. It's Friday, and you watch movies every Friday, don't you? " I smile while saying this, because I know that movie day is her favourite day of the week. She rolls over and sits up with excitement,

"Oh yeah! We are watching Finding Nemo today!!" Finding Nemo is her all-time favourite movie, and I can picture her sitting on the green and blue carpet, staring up at the television with awe at the colours and hiding whenever Bruce the shark came on the screen. I get her up and walk over to her closet. I pull out a cute pair of pink jeans and a white shirt with pink ruffles. She gets dressed and I put her white-blonde hair into cute pigtails. She holds her hands in the air, waiting for me to pick her up. I grab her and carry her downstairs I sit her down on the kitchen table.

"Do you want a bagel for breakfast? Or do you want cereal?"

"Ummm...." she responds, cocking her head to the side, "Bacon!" She exclaims.

"That wasn't one of the options!!" I run over to her and start to tickle her sides. Her laughter rings in my ears, and I smile. If it weren't for her, I would go insane in a place like this. I sit her down in her chair, and go over to the stove. I turn on the element, and take out a frying pan. I open the fridge and pull out the package of bacon. I cook the pieces through and put them on a plate for her. On the edge of the plate I put a pile of maple syrup. Just the way she likes it, and she gets it from me. Right at the same time I put the plate on the table in front of her, our father walks in the front door. He stumbles into the kitchen and bumps into me standing protectively in front of my sister. I don't want him anywhere near Julie.

"You look... Horrible...." He says to me, his words slurring together as he looks me over. I look down at my dark wash jeggings and white tank top with a lace overlay. I look back at Julie, who is looking up at me, confused.

"No, Daddy. She looks pretty." She pipes up, trying to defend me.

"No she doesn't Julie. And you better hope you end up looking like me, and not you sister or your mother." He looks at me again with disgust, and then let's out a loud belch. I look at the time, seeing that it said 7:30. I tell Julie to finish her breakfast and then to brush her teeth. As I clean up the mess from the bacon, put away the syrup, and put the frying pan in the sink, she shoves the last piece of bacon in her mouth and runs off to the bathroom. After she's out of earshot, I turn to my dad,

"What the hell was that?" I say through my teeth. He turns to face me, and the smell of alcohol wafts off his breath.

"Don't give me attitude. You look ugly, as usual, and I thought I should let you know."

"Just leave us alone. We don't need you." I hiss, whispering because Julie is bounding back into the kitchen baring her teeth so I can check her teeth over. "Looks good, sugar pie! Let's move!!" She screams as I swoop her up, and carry her out the door, grabbing my purse, and loading her into the car. I drop her off at her daycare, and drive off to school.