Rebirth

Chapter 28

"I have to ask you something," Greer said softly. Mary looked up from her little Francis, who lay in her arms peacefully, to the eyes of her dear friend who was courting her elder half brother.

"Yes, Greer?" she asked, suddenly remembering every time she'd call his name and how he'd reply with a soft 'yes, Mary?' and patiently wait for her response, a sweet smile on his face, that calming, melodic and beautiful voice never failing to make her heart beat faster. Mary gulped back a round of tears and looked at the little boy who held his moniker quickly, allowing the twelve week old baby to wrap his tiny fingers around her pointer finger where her English coronation ring lay, right next to his signet ring.

"We're women, correct?" she said. Mary frowned a little, not understanding what she was going to say next.

"Correct?" Mary questioned.

"And, women have needs, yes?" she asked. Mary knew there was two ways this conversation could go, and she didn't like either of them.

"Yes?"

"I'm not trying to insult, but you've not known a man since the twins' father? You were always drugged with Stefan?"

"I was?"

"How does one deal with needs, when their love isn't around?" Greer asked. Mary chuckled.

"This is an awkward conversation," Mary chuckled. "One simply dives into work until the one they love returns."

"But," Greer couldn't help but say. "But, not about me, now, how do you deal with this?"

"I simply don't think about it, and focus on other things,"

"And will do so until you die?"

"I will. There is no alternative."

"Why don't you take another husband?"

"What is the point of this conversation?"

"I'm curious."

"I won't take another as my king as there is simply no need to. My countries don't need an alliance that requires marriage, i'll never willingly wed again. Besides, bar from my first, I never wanted to marry in the first place."

"If you fell in love again?"

"We both know that'll never happen," Mary said quickly, remembering how she had said those exact words in the exact same way, just before the conception of her most politically important child, when the only man she'd ever loved wanted her to wed his brother.

"Will you not wed another, because of your devotion to Francis? Is this the larger issue?"

"It is, in addition to my other reasons. I won't love another man, bar my children when they grow in this world, my country doesn't need a marriage alliance and I don't need another heir. There's simply no reason to wed. I'll go down in history as the headstrong queen who refuses to wed, who brought her country to it's greatest power without the help of a man."

"You told me once, that when Francis was dying, all those years ago, he lay on the ground and begged you to wed and love again, after everything would settle in France. I'm sure he'd want to see you happy again, with a partner."

"And i did." Mary said swiftly. "I wed and loved. I wed three more times, the first a political necessity, the second an unwilling and forced marriage, and the third a simple agreement. I loved again, I love my children, my family and my people. I have a partner in those who share the regencies with me, and in my children. I'll never romantically love again, but I have love around me."

"This would be different, if Francis survived?"

"Of course. I'd have a partner and a king, the only man I ever loved and will ever love by my side. We would be happy, my children his. But my life was not supposed to be that way. But," she paused, gripping her dearest friend's hand. "we've made the best of it, have we not?" Mary smiled.