TF2 One-Shots OUTDATED (Migrated to new book)

Dealing with a Drunken Y/N

Thank you MutatedScorpionQueen for the request. Sorry for the wait!!

Demo:
Dealing with you?
What's that supposed to mean?
He was the one that GOT you drunk.
Man... relationship goals, I tell ya.

Pyro:
He thinks it's all silly until you start to sob.
Then he KNOWS something is wrong. He picks you up and brings you to the room, trying to get you to calm down by snuggling you.
But you're restless and end up playing neither his hair, babbling on about random crap that isn't relevant.
Who was this 'Sigma' and WHAT about his nose?
He didn't know.
But he didn't care.
He sat there and let you go on and on for about an hour or so before you crashed.

Scout:
The big boy decided to try and get drunk with you.
Yeahhhhhhhh, bad idea.
Instead of him taking care of you, YOU took care of HIM.
Poor boy couldn't hold his liquor...
But when he doesn't, he gets super cautious about you and your actions.
Making sure you're not going to hurt yourself or anyone, at that matter.

Heavy:
The big Russian bear knows a thing or two about vodka.
You on the other hand, don't!
And that brings a hilarious outcome to the table.
All you remember is you taking a shot
"Woah I feel funny."
Then everything goes fuzzy...
Misha won't tell you what happened.
But trust me...
It was a TIME.

Medic:
Oh boy, here we go...
He tells you all the time to stay away from alcohol, it's bad... do you listen? No. Not at all.
In fact, you LIKE to defy his statements .
Why?
Because you love the feeling of him getting you sober and trying to correct you.
That little feeling he gets of "Ah Sh!t, here we go again." With the underlying "Oh, you little turd." In a good sense that just makes you feel all giggly inside.

Sniper:
He gives you coffee... a LOT of it.
Maybe a little too much—?
Nah, screw that!
It's never enough!!!
....
..........
Uuuuntill you come out of it and you spend about 2 hours on the toilet...
Ouch...
Hey, he was just trying to help.

Soldier:
He thinks to himself: "can I physically chase it out?"
He makes you run a few laps and exercise, keeping a close watch on you.
It's hilarious to watch you try and lift weights while the world around you is spinning like a top in a tornado.
It's NOT so funny though, the you end up throwing up all over, crashing to the floor in absolute pain and dizziness.
He then brings you to the room and lets medic fix you, because apparently his methods aren't working.

Engi:
He keeps you confined to a room, because last time you got drunk, you trashed the place.
And of course no one wanted to clean up so HE had to.
He brings you bottles upon bottles of water to chug and sits with you, watching and making sure you don't have a heart attack.
Though, the things you do and say are enough to give someone one.

Spy:
He doesn't do anything.
He lets you terrorize the team, spewing quotes and slurs that they can use against you like back-mail if they ever needed to win a argument.
He also likes it when you're like this...because you don't know boundaries...
Especially with him.
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