just a book.

what's wrong with me?

Okay, this is going to be typed " properly " to help me tell the difference from sentence to sentence.

I'm so stupid, so fucking stupid. Don't even try to comment to reassure me. I'm stupid. Why the hell did I hurt her? She didn't deserve it. I'm so horrible and I just deserve death. Life is decent. It's my fault though. All of it.

It started one doomed Wednesday morning. 4th period Social Studies class was starting, and of course for whatever reason I decided to reach to the student to my right. Suddenly, the desk tipped and I was stuck with the desk on my ankle and I almost couldn't get out.

8th period class was probably worse. I was in a decently good mood, ready to take the vocabulary test. I've basically never studied anything and done just fine with everything else. But this? Oh for the love of-

i failed

i fucking failed a test

and the system's gonna call my parents as soon as the grade's put in.

i didn't know what to do.

so i cried

and cried some more

and Saudi kept her arm over me protectively.

im glad i met someone like her.

i still feel bad for shoving her in 4th hour

she watches me type my stories, sometimes.

okay, a lot of the time.

im really thankful she exists.

and here I am.

on the bus, typing this shithole of vent.

and im trying not to cry.

and Saudi's holding me protectively.