An Open Letter to Jolene (HS AU)

Jolene

I froze when I read the first line of her letter. I didn't know what to think at first, but soon felt a familiar anger burning at my cheeks.

Who does she think she is?! My eyesight swirled with angry tears as I read through the letter and angrily crumpled it up and shoved it in my pocket.

"Ugh!" I huffed, probably too loudly, and drew the attention of my co-worker.

"You okay?" She asked, raising her eyebrow in skepticism, dipping her reading glasses further down the bridge of her nose to look at me. 

"Yeah, it's just..." I blinked away a few angry tears, hating that I cried every time I got emotional. It's a weakness people always blamed on my over-emotional causing red hair.

"I'm fine." I said flatly once I'd composed myself, and walked into the staff room. I closed the door and leaned back on it with another angry huff. That bitch, I wanted to scream. Who does she even think she is? Sliding down the door until I was sitting, I slumped against it, the tears coming back uncontrollably, hot and angrily streaming down my face.

Who does she think I am? I'm not a slut, I don't sleep with other girl's boyfriends. I didn't even know he had a girlfriend - if that's what she was. What if he was secretly married?? I wasn't sure what I was more mad at - him for cheating, or me for getting tricked? He didn't seem the type; he was so kind and caring, though he was a bit of a flirt.

I bit my lip and blushed at the memory of our first meeting. He'd come to the library to install a new printer, since the old one made an awful sound and left streaks of toner all over the page. He had to get under my desk to plug in a few wires, and made a joke about the awkward situation.

"I usually like to take a girl out on a date or two before getting between her legs." He said with a smirk, looking up at me from under my desk with those irresistible green eyes.

"Why don't you?" I replied nervously. "Better late than never, right?" I smiled teasingly.

He got a glint in his eye and cocked his head. He hesitated (now I know why...) before a smirk spread across his face and those dimples popped out. 

"You like sushi? I know a great place off Elm Street. Want to meet there at say...when do you get off?" He asked smoothly, clearly very experienced at this.

"We close at 7, so I can be there by 7:15." I answered.

"Perfect, " he replied, and we exchanged phone numbers.

I'm actually a bit impressed (though equally revolted) that he took me out to dinner, the movies, and other public places, knowing someone, or even his girlfriend, might see us. That takes balls to be so blatant about having an affair. That word's always made me cringe, and I can't believe I'm a part one now. I feel even worse knowing she's one of my library patrons, someone I've spoken too and checked out books for...How do you do that to her? My anger turned from myself to Harry the longer I thought about it, and grabbed my phone to text him before I could rationalize or filter my thoughts.

'How could you? I can't believe it!' I angrily texted and hit send just as there was a knock on the door.

I jumped up, since I was leaning on the door, and my co-worker poked her head around the door as I wiped my eyes.

"Wifi's down. The IT guy will be here to fix it soon." She announced, and retreated, leaving me alone again.

"Wait!" I shook my head and tried to think clearly. "No need to call him, we probably just need to restart the router." I explained and ran after her. I can't see him right now, especially not here.

"We tried that. He says he thinks it's a problem with the modem, so he's bringing us a spare." She explained, and my mind raced as I tried to think of a reason to stop him, or for me to get out of there. "Why? I thought you were sweet on him?" She asked, turning to me with a bit of a smile.

I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to see him because I might tear his head off? Or I might just scream or become hysterical the second I see him? Or I might freeze and stare at him angrily - which is exactly what I did.