Why?

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I rolled along the pavement, dodging the people walking past me. I've had a few near death experiences so far and so I want to get to church quickly. I take the shortcut through an alleyway, where I noticed many people selling drugs. I really must remember to pay my drug dealer now that I think about it. I finally get to church, and I see the great ketchup god before me. The ketchup god died for us all, he was squeezed into a bottle to forgive us of our sins and for that, I am truly grateful.

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