my shity art

Vent sorry yall

Okay so I was at a part with my 18 year old cushion and 15 year old boyfriend and I was okay with it and all I just didn't wanna go because I knew they would kiss and shit like that well anyway I stayed positive and was like " oh cmon Sam it's not that bad" y'know well we got there and I got pissed the fuck off they were talking about porn, sex, losing their virginity and the dudes 11 year old brother was talking about fuckin a girl in a green house a fucking green house who the hell dose that!? Like bro just because you lost you virginity to some person doesn't mean shit I'm not like you, then the 11 year old started talking about porn and shit witch disguised me, I know we all have watched it before hell I watched it like once and I don't find anything about it that turns me on it's gross and shit but the point is they promised me nothing like this would happen and yet again I get lied to and I'm tired of seeing all these beautiful girls around my age lose something they can't find again, I just wanna promise myself I will not do the same thing, I'm honestly scared I'm tired of being lied to if your gunna lie just.. don't talk to me I've been lied to enough. I'm sorry I'm putting this on y'all I've never done this or told anyone how I feel I'm just so hurt and up set because my cushion knows ash isn't even around here then she wants me to go fuck a dude at a party tomorrow night, no I'm not doing that I'm happy with ash and I don't need nothing else