p o e t r y T I M E

d a n c i n g i n the r a i n

Rain.

It's raining.

You and your friends run.

And run.

You spread out your arms and you spin.

The cold water splashing on your face.

You turn and you turn and you turn and you turn and you turn and you turn and you turn...

The best feeling you have ever felt washes over you with the rain...

And you feel... free.

Freer than you have ever felt.

You feel beautiful.

And you feel graceful.

Soon, your body is moving on its own.

And you are dancing.

Dancing in the rain.

Soon, however, reality comes creeping back.

And there you are,

dancing in the rain

with a group of friends

who are all amazing dancers...

unlike you.

The feeling of self-consciousness that plagues your mind,

comes back.

And you stop,

and look around

at the sight of your amazing friends

dancing in the rain.

And there you are,

soaked to the bone,

feeling embarrassed.

Feeling embarrassed while

your friends are dancing in the rain.

That familiar feeling of regret comes back to you.

The same feeling you get, most times you open your mouth.

And embarrassment is almost always a feeling that comes with it.

They are like partners,

joint at the hip.

You feel like they are judging you,

but in your heart, you know they don't care.

And that they aren't judging you.

And that they were probably so wrapped up in the feeling of freedom

that they didn't even notice your dancing.

Your dancing in the rain.

And you know that they love you.

But that still doesn't help with the feelings that these two partners bring,

the ones you will continue to feel your whole life.

All you know is that you will be praying tonight,

asking for forgiveness,

for being so annoying.

And for bothering everyone.

Like you do almost every night.

But, as they stop dancing,

dancing in the rain,

you act like you don't feel a remorse

or a single feeling of guilt,

and you continue to make a fool of yourself,

and only half-enjoying the interactions you are having with your friends

because you keep making annoying jokes

and annoying remarks

that probably bother everyone.

And all you want to do is stop.

But you can't seem to.

And words stream out of your mouth...

almost as fast as the falling rain that...

you were just dancing in.

All you know is that you will be praying tonight,

asking for forgiveness,

for being so annoying.

And for bothering everyone.

Like you do almost every night.

And all you know is that you are hoping none of them read this,

but you publish this anyway...

because some part of you wants them to find this.

Yet, you also hope they never will because...

All you know is that you will be praying tonight,

asking for forgiveness,

for being so annoying.

And for bothering everyone.

Like you do almost every night.

But, you will always remember the beautiful feeling of

dancing in the rain.

And you will still dance alone,

when home-alone,

enjoying how graceful and beautiful you feel,

as your favorite songs blast through the hallways.

And even when you make funny and silly dances,

it's okay because you have no one with you to annoy.

And you have no reason to feel embarrassed.

And you have no reason to feel regret.

But, you will always remember the beautiful feeling of

dancing in the rain.