The Voice I Was Given.

One More Night pt 2

        The soft sound of wood popping and the distant rush of waves interrupted the otherwise silent evening. As the sun began to set, it left pink and purple streaks across the sky, slowly letting the stars peak out of its light. A gentle breeze disturbed the leaves on the palm trees in the backyard. The smell of smoke rising up from the tiny fire that Hypatia and River sat in front of. They breathed in sync, River resting his head in the crook her neck again, his tail wrapped around Hypatia. She was leaning against them, drawing, both quite content. As it got darker, crickets began to sing and frogs croaked. One by one, they joined the cacophonous orchestra. River began to hum, deep and quiet, blowing air through his gills.

"That feels so weird," Hypatia laughed. "I feel your chin on my shoulder but you're breathing on my hair."

River pointed to the picture that she was drawing. She stopped laughing and held it up for him to see. Over time, Hypatia had asked River over and over if she could draw him. He said yes every time, of course, but on the condition that he got to watch. River loved how Hypatia drew, with her smooth lines and how quickly she was able to get a nearly perfect outline. It was very relaxing to watch, and River usually ended up watching through half-lidded eyes. Right now, she was drawing the both of them, just how they were at that moment.

"Do you like it?"

River nodded and then rested his head on her shoulder again. He closed his eyes, just letting all of his other senses take everything in. He loved the sounds that the fire made, the smell of smoke and sea, the gentle way that Hypatia's hair brushed across his face. As he took each breath, he wished that he didn't have to go. If River had a choice, he would definitely stay with Hypatia, but their life together wouldn't work. True, they found a way to make their relationship work temporarily, but, deep in his heart, River knew that Hypatia deserved better. She deserved someone that could be shown to other people, someone who could take care of her, go to work, take her out to eat, and do the normal things that human couples did. From the beginning, River knew that he was cursed to live his life alone, just living off of instinct. Hypatia could never be his. It was a fact that felt like a knife in River's heart but he buried it down enough so that he could enjoy his last few hours with Hypatia. When he opened his eyes, there was so much that he wanted to tell her; feelings that he'd forced down and kept secret since the day he first saw her on the boat and apparently even before that.

"What is it, River?" she asked him, looking up from her drawing, feeling his eyes on her.

He just shook his head, looking away. It would be better if she didn't know. Of course, he knew that she probably loved him too, but it would be better if she didn't know just how much he loved her. He didn't want to bring more pain to her than she already had. River would rather go his entire life knowing that he hadn't told her and she moved on than have himself be the reason why she couldn't move on. Knowing that would haunt him. River made a decision. He wasn't going to come back. Instead, River would live life in the way that he was made to live it: alone, spending his time hunting for his next meal and fighting for his life. Again, this was something that he wasn't going to tell Hypatia.

"We should probably go inside in a bit," Hypatia sighed after about another half hour.

River nodded in agreement, suddenly letting go of Hypatia. She looked at him with a curious expression, and then seemed even more confused when River put the fire out. After that, he just simply signed, wait, and pointed at the sky. It took a few minutes, but, when Hypatia's eyes finally adjusted she understood what River was trying to do it.

Hundreds of thousands of stars lit up the sky now, very visible without the glare of the firelight distracting them. It was so beautiful, and, now, she understood why River had said that her freckles were like the stars. There was so many of them, and they scattered themselves across the sky's face. And, she also understood finally that they were beautiful. River came back to Hypatia, again wrapping himself around her.

"You will be so lonely," Hypatia whispered. "And I will be too. Fate has cursed our paths, I guess."

It's not so bad, River wanted to tell her. With time, you get used to everything.

But would he? He lived the past three years in complete solitude, much like any other large sea predator. But was he just that now? A creature that lived through nothing more than just instinct and the will to survive? No, he was so much more than that now. He was emotion. River craved touch and he didn't just want to survive anymore. He wanted to live, now that he knew that there was a way to luxury and ease. It had given him time to enjoy the simple things that he hadn't before.

A part of River knew that if he didn't let go of this new part of him, he would die. It would stretch with him across the sea all the way from Hypatia's house until it snapped and he would be gone.

That following morning, both River and Hypatia were a mess. River mostly so because he knew that he couldn't return. That would be better for Hypatia and he knew it. Then there was Hypatia, who knew that he had to let go of him for a second time. They came to the beach for the last time and just stayed there, staring at the water.

I have to go, River signed. Goodbye.

Hypatia's eyes filled with tears and she embraced him. "I'm going to miss you so much, River. Please, come back like you promised."

The knife was back in River's heart. He wouldn't be coming back. It was too dangerous for him and for Hypatia. Instead, he just gave a tiny nod, knowing that it was a promise that he could not keep.

Then, River was gone, pumping his tail as fast as he could, not daring to turn back. He knew if he did, he would go back to her.

And that was the worst thing he could do to her.