Hurt Me Now Or Save Me

"Stiles- Stiles just STOP!"

Stiles' flurry of movement and rush of words stopped. There was a distance between them this time that felt different, insurmountable.

Derek looked like speaking pained him. "Just stop. You're too loud. I'm tired of this. Stiles we're nothing. This is nothing, it has always been nothing-"

"Der how can you sa-"

His objection only served to make Derek more determined. "You're nothing to me."

Stiles' adamency disappeared to be slapped with a look of broken betrayal and sorrow.

Stiles' eyebrows were furrowed in pain and Derek's were wide with a look of shock, unbelieving in the hurt he inflicted.

Stiles' mouth gaped and his voice shook. "I- I- I'm nothing? In all our fights I've been annoying, inconvenient, a bastard, a shit, intolerable, an asshole, but I have never, ever, been nothing to you. But maybe that is what I am. Maybe I'm just wasting my time. Maybe I've wasted all this time confusing you not wanting to be saved for really not worth being saved. I wanted to believe it so bad. That you could love me, but you can't, can you?" He felt his stomach drop out as he went to turn away.

Derek caught his arm. "Wait. That's not- I didn't- I didn't mean it like that."

"No, no it's okay." He had a bitter smile on his face. "I know I've already hit the ground. Come on Derek, don't pull any punches. I already know. You said we should just let it go." Stiles snatched his arm back.

Derek remembered void Stiles having more emotion in his eyes than he did now.

Derek desperately grabbed for his hand, but again Stiles pulled away.

"I'm nothing." He nodded his head minutely. "Okay. Consider this me letting it go."

"Fuck Stiles don't leave. I don't know why I said that. I'm sorry I didn't mean to make things worse. Please just stop!"

Stiles didn't even flinch at him shouting as he grabbed his keys of the counter.

Tears blurred his vision as he drove. He was turning corners sharp and fast. It always ended like this when Stiles was holding out for something that would never come, but maybe it should actually end this time. A plume of smoke from the engine had him pulling over. He punched the wheel once he was stopped. "God! Why does every thing I love break down!" He dropped his head against the wheel. As he sobbed his mind forced all the memories from their fights to be replayed.

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"Don't be a dumbass Stiles!"

Stiles looked around at the pack with a look of incredibility. "Me?! I'm being a dumbass?! No. No sir. That would be the stupidwolf that thinks he can run out of the blast radius in less than three seconds! I don't care if you're Barry fucking Allen you aren't getting out of there before you get blown to bits! And I will not le-"

"You won't let me what? You Stiles Stilinski what exactly won't you let me do? We aren't debating why you won't let me go, I'm asking how you think you could stop me?"

"We both know I am more than able to stop you."

Lydia's eyes shifted swiftly from one to the other with an edge of uncomfort. "Alright boys you're both special. Now can we please calm down.

Derek scoffed haughtily eyes not even leaving Stiles'. "You mean your little sparklers Deaton lets you set off time to time?"

Stiles' eyes glowed a bright purple as he snarled more wild than any wolf. His fingers twitched as he spat his words. "I'm not afraid of you anymore. Let's go sourwolf. Let's see if you've gotten any immunity to electricity." Threatening purple sparks flickered off his hands. "Oh wait, no. We both know you don't. Still why don't we try. From what you've told me it sounds like fun. She had fun with you didn't she?" Stiles took a threatening step forward.