Tripping On Love

2. Angst

'My brain is a ticking time bomb
Trapped in a brittle cage of bones.
Finely grated cherry and somb-
-er littering the warm undertones.

Mood always made from scratch,
Admitting fault to those around you.
Whipped butter and whipped flesh,
Cut and paste with a side of fruit.
Sometimes it's good to be fresh.

Scarlet sweet swirls formulating
Around a cream cheese frosting,
Raspberry blood, never been so devastating.
But just how much-'

        Melanie's mindless writing of poetry was cut short, her teacher tapping her shoulder and pausing her pencil scratching.

        "Melanie? Would you like to join the class?" The woman murmured softly, patting her on the back before returning to the front of the room.

        Melanie shoved the paper into her bag, a deep sigh escaping her lips. She was happy, in a way; people cared so little for her existence that they didn't even bother laughing at her ridicule. They just gave her silent stares, for a moment, before returning to whatever very important task they were doing a second before. The 18 year old sank low into her chair, burying her face in her arms.

        The day felt like it dragged on forever. Each class was its own day, rightfully. But as the school day wound down, it began to look up, as Melanie finally got to meet up with her friend Vivian in the bathroom. Vivian has been the one person who'd stuck by Melanie since they met in 7th grade, despite everything.

        "I was worried I wouldn't see you today," Melanie confessed, smiling.

        "You'll see me whether you're worried you will or not," Vivian replied with a similar smile, hopping up on the sink to sit. "You seem kind of out of it today though, Mel."

        "Tired. Didn't sleep."

        "I thought that's why you went to the doctor the other day? Like. Literally that exact reason?"

        "But I don't want to be my mom—"

        "Fuck, Mel, come on. The only way you're becoming like her is by coming up with excuses for stupid shit."

        Vivian always had such a way with words.

        "It's just sleep. Why do I need to take such strong pills—just to fucking sleep?" Melanie presses her forehead against the mirror above one of the sinks. "It's just too risky."

        "Like, she'll take them? Or you'll take too many?"

        "...Never mind. Anyway, Vi...have you ever had regrets?" Melanie turned around, leaning against the wall and tilting her head at Vivian.

        "Well, yeah. Who doesn't? I've done some awful shit."

        "No, I mean like...regretting not doing things. My entire high school career has been fucked. I've been such an antisocial bitch, and with the incident, I just—I haven't gotten to do anything normal high schoolers do."

        "Like what?" Vivian frowned.

        "Stupid shit! Drinking, partying, going out with random guys, having actual fun!"

        "You're 18, Mel. Don't be a drama queen—you very well have time to do dumb shit, trust me."

        "But...still..." Melanie pouted, feeling dejected that Vivian wasn't fully getting it. "Now."

        "Fine!" Vivian threw her hands up in the air. "You want to do stupid shit? Jump into things you know you aren't ready for? Fine. Just don't complain to me afterwards."

        Vivian left the bathroom, the air of tension and expectancy left behind so thick that Melanie thought she could cut it with a knife. After hearing someone in a stall cough and realizing they'd heard it all, Mel made a hasty exit.