Falling This Hard

Funny how fate works

It's sometimes funny how time works. We're normally so engrossed in our lives, going about our normal routines, not really noticing how it's running with each breath we take. But then something happens, we lose something we hold dear and each passing moment becomes too excruciating, too painful. We start to notice how life and everybody else is running ahead, but we're still stuck on the memories and too numb to move ahead with time.

It had exactly been a month since he left and each night since that day consisted of the same routine. Each moment we spent, each laugh we shared, each fight we had since second grade played like a movie on a loop every night while staring at the ceiling till it became too painful to continue and tears made an appearance. It's exactly how I'd been falling asleep every night.

Alex and Irina had been nothing but supportive. I knew that Kyle's absence affected them the same way it did with me. But it was extremely frustrating that they'd started walking on eggshells around me, thinking I was on the verge of breaking down any moment.

That night I was hoping to break the cycle, distract my mind and spend time with my parents. It'd be the first in nearly a month we all would have dinner together. They'd been in and out of the city because of some major business projects the company was focusing on. I was desperately looking forward to spending time with them. I'd missed them terribly. I couldn't help but resent their business due to the fact that we'd grown apart so much in the last two years. I used to tell them every single thing. They even knew how I felt about Kyle, but they were hardly around for that now.

The sound of the door opening broke me out of my thoughts. I hopped off the bed and went out of my bedroom to the living room down the stairs.

Dad had just entered with mom behind him and placed his briefcase on the center table near the sofa. The sound of my approaching footsteps made them both lookup. Identical smiles were etched on their faces as they noticed me. My chest was filled with happiness and I felt giddy with excitement. My grin must have mirrored theirs as I walked the distance between us in few short strides to engulf both of them in a bear hug.

My dad chortled and ruffled my hair.

"Hey kiddo."

Mom kissed my cheek as I dropped my arms from around them.

"How was your trip dad? I'm so happy you both came back. Percy just finished making lasagna and your favorite mushroom ravioli for dinner mom!"

Percy was a short and petite fifty-five-year-old caretaker of our mansion. I'd known her my entire life, and she was basically a second mother to me.

They both looked at each other as something akin to uncertainty  crossed their features. I knew that look. I'd become familiar all too with it since the past few years.

"About that honey..."

Dad trailed off as they both gauged my reaction with wary expressions.

"Don't tell me you both are leaving again." I tried to keep my voice as calm as possible.

"No no! we're not leaving. It's just...see honey there's this really important investor that's currently in town. Nate Andrews. He decided to throw a party and invited all of us. We wouldn't cancel dinner if it wasn't so important."

Mom said in a calm and collected voice as if she didn't just canceled the night I'd been waiting for weeks.

At that moment, all the emotions I'd been suppressing just became too much to handle. I'd already lost one person I loved and now it seemed as if they too were slowly moving away. They'd been practically absent from the past months and the little time we spent always ended up with us fighting about business school. The one night we were supposed to spend time together as a family, they go and do something like this. Anger slowly burned through me as my hands shook with all the suppressed emotions ready to explode out like a volcano.

"No"

I hissed through clenched teeth while clenching my fists tightly, nail digging into my palms.

"Melanie.."Mom started with a stern voice but I cut her off immediately.

"I said no mom!" my voice raised a few notches, "One night mom, one night! That was all I asked! But of course, there's always something more important than me. Did you both had any idea that Kyle left town?"

The look of shock that crossed their features was evident enough.

"How can you both know when you're so busy rubbing elbows with important people that you don't even have time for own daughter?"

"You won't use that tone with us, Melanie."

Dad's voiced echoed around the house. I had just enough. Tears pricked the corners of my eyes and I rubbed at them in a pathetic attempt not to cry in front of them.

Their eyes softened and my mom reached for me but I just took a few steps backward shaking my head.

"No, you know what it doesn't even matter. You can go to that stupid party. I won't say anything because you just made your priorities crystal clear. It'll always be work over me and that damn business school over my own dreams."

I ran upstairs as they called after me and slammed the door of my room. I slumped to the ground as silent sobs racked through me. How is it even possible for me to still have tears left? They knocked on the door continuously and pleaded that I talk to them. But I couldn't with the amount of anger surging through my veins at that moment.

******

One hour had passed already since my parents left for the party. The fact that they left without even trying a little harder stung like a bitch. My mind was ready to explode as I stared outside my bedroom window into the dark expanse of the night sky with millions of stars. There was always something so beautiful yet melancholy about a night sky filled with so many of them.

Maybe what they said at school was true. I didn't deserve Kyle. Maybe I'm not even worth fighting for if my parents can't be bothered to spend even a little time with me. I get it about their responsibilities and business, but is one night too much to ask?

The sound of my phone ringing cut into the silence of my bedroom. I grabbed it from the side table and saw Alina's name flashing across the screen. I was a little surprised that she was calling me at this hour. Since everything that went down between uncle Ben and dad, we haven't talked all that much. I swiped across the screen to pick up the call and the sound of her hysterical sobs echoed throughout the room. Dread settled in my gut almost immediately.

"Hey..hey Woah Al calm down! What is it?"

"Mel..It's .." She choked onto another sob. "Dad is coming at your place to get you...they just called him a few minutes ago."

"Wha....what do you mean?"

A ball of panic exploded within me at her words and my hands started trembling. I tightened my grip on the phone.

"What do you mean they just called him Mel?? Answer me damn it!!"

She was still sobbing as terror seized my limbs and the goosebumps erupted all over my bare arms

"It's your mom and dad Mel. There was a collision with a ten-wheeler at the highway..."

Her words became distant and in the next moment I was drowning, my lungs were struggling for air and I could hear my heart beating at an unnatural rate. I struggled to move but my limbs were dead weights under the grip of panic and terror seeping into my bones.

The second I was pulled out of the trance, the sound of her sobs became clear and the reality of the situation hit me like a freight train.

My hands trembled uncontrollably, and the phone dropped to the floor. I felt bile rise up my throat and I threw up before everything faded to blackness.

I cried like a baby while writing this chapter. Let me know your thoughts in the comments.