Uh Oh, Please No

°1°

"Tell me, young one."

Young? He most certainly wasn't young.

"What is your deepest regret?"

He took his chance to breathe, to recall his worst nightmares; pain called for him and he answered easily, "Killing Izuna Uchiha."

The voice of the void remained silent for a moment- not that Tobirama would  care. It felt like decades in this endless void, "If you had the chance to redo it all, would you?"

The moment of truth:

"Of course."

And that's how Tobirama found himself staring at the delighted face of Hashirama Senju, his older brother.

"Congratulations, it's a girl!"

You what, mate.

HE was Tobirama Senju, second Hokage, inventor of the Flying Thunder God Jutsu along with the Shadow Clone Jutsu. He was not female and never will be!

He turned his brown eyes (although he knew they would be red sooner or later) towards his father.

Ah yes, what a bundle of joy his- sorry- her father was.

"Tch, I suppose we could do with a bargaining chip anyway. Perhaps an alliance with the Hyuga," his father glared at the new-born with unrivalled hatred.

If only this man knew. If only. He would be bowing down to this fair lady; wishing her to grant him the blessing of a goddess.

Tobirama could accept being a female when there wasn't a sexist bastard in the room.

"Father," Hashirama started with naïve curiosity, "What's a bar-bar-barjenen chip? Is it food? Father, I'm hungry."

Ah, Hashirama. Bless his still male soul.

The head Senju shook his head, "You'll understand very well when you're older."

Tobirama would make sure he wouldn't.

"U-um," the nurse grabbed the attention of the two Senju, "What would you like to name her, Senju-sama?"

Butsuma stared at the female - who, might I add, has yet to cry or show any sign of emotion - with cold, calculating eyes, "Tobiko. Tobiko Senju."

'To fly' , 'Child.' How lovely. Imagine someone screaming, "To fly, child! To fly!"

Well, that was basically Tobirama's new name.

And, yes, his - crap - her mother has been blatantly ignored all this time.

"Leaving me out of deciding her name, Butsuma?" The female Senju challenged the Head of the Clan, locking eyes with him.

She eventually just sighed, "Whatever."

'Wha-?! Unbelievable! Don't tell me this was how Tobirama was decided on as well?!'

"After all, we did agree that if she was a boy I'd name them Tobirama," Yep. She hit it right in the bullseye.

It was soon after that she was handed to Butsuma.

'Oho if this lad wants to be a sexist bastard I'll be a picky bastard!'

And with that thought, Tobiko began to cry, reaching out towards her brother: Hashirama.

Butsuma began to sweat nervously, clearly not having expected the silent child to burst into frenzied, chaotic tears of pain, suffering and sadism.

But oh well. He just showed a 5-year old Hashirama how to hold a baby properly and handed her over to him. No big deal.

Either way, Tobiko shut up and fell asleep.

~

From  a young age Tobiko was taught the social ettiquettes of being a proper lady.

Yeah, it didn't exactly end well. After all, Tobiko was the mighty male Tobirama; she wasn't about to abandon that part of her.

Not until she can change everything.

Eh, she'll cross that bridge when she gets there. After all, she was only five years old. It was around this time that she would be practicing her kenjutsu and ninjutsu. That, and learning about the cursed Uchiha brats that dared to face the Senju. In her father's words, anyway.

Despite popular belief, Tobirama did hold some respect for the Uchiha. Just, not... him. The one who abandoned the village, who refused to accept the peace treaty.

Who should've died. Who shouldn't have started the 4th Shinobi War.

"Tobiko," she heard her father call. Just like in the past, her mother was never usually there, "I'll be leaving to meet with the village elders now. Make sure Hashirama is informed."

She nodded briefly, refusing to make eye contact with the Senju. Upon hearing the front door slam, she glared at the window, brown eyes shifting into place.

'Should I? Should I? Fuck it,' she thought, opening the window and jumping out, white hair flowing freely,'It's either me or Hashirama going there first.'

Quite easily, the reborn Senju snuck around the numerous civilians and Shinobi of her clan, the albino somehow not standing out. Swiftly, she scaled the wall using her chakra, beginning a mad dash into the forest.

Tobiko watched as the trees blurred past her in a unified green; a small smile gracing her lips. She would change it. She had to.

The future was up to her now.