The Defiled

"They"

"You're meant to be here, so live then leave like leaves in autumn"- KKRM.
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An early gush of Autumn wind breezed in through my window. Of course, I wasn't the type to get out of bed as soon as the alarm clock pried my reluctant eyes open. I mused myself staring while still under my covers.

The window was faced east from my bed and was the perfect size for a person like me. One which did not let too much in or out. It was painted enamel-white at the frames and let out to a beautiful sight of planted  forest by the mountain slope. But the window was not what made me mellow often.

The thin, fragile-looking, amber- coloured curtains hung slightly above the window frame. It was swayed by the breezing wind, fluttering, maybe peacefully alive at that moment.
Wind being its music. I the affected sole being. For once, it seemed as if that thin, fragile thing lived and own it's life.

A while after, dawn broke. I could now see sun rays seep in through, illuminating the curtain, my adamant soul mellowing. Gentle, my first light coerced me to the window, the Sky's light my salvation. Allured, I spoke to myself. It was only at moments like these that I could let my guard down.

That was how this Fateful day began.

                                  ***

I filed into the room proceeding to take a seat at my usual place. There were people in already, rushing to complete the assignment that was due today. Evidently, our busy life is a major cause of us being a population lacking introspection. Of course I have a social life to take care of, sleep that was procrastinated and a ton of things written passionately and forgotten safely in my bullet journal.

I pulled out my Physics textbook remembering that I was terrible at it. I always joked that if I had been a physicist then probably I'd be the reason for those renowned to pull triggers. I'd probably be taught by my own students.
Staring at page 31 of my book, I was in another train of thought when my eyes focused on the asterisk mark I made.

I was now staring deeply into my physics book when I heard Mr Trevor say " Lyra Waters, please meet me after class." I nodded.

Carrying assignment files to the teacher's office was never my thing but today, I felt liberated, out of that room, that room where "she" lived differently. Mr Trevor now was seated motioning for me to take a seat after the CR excused herself. His brow knitted as he rummage through his drawers, then placing a piece of crushed-paper smoothed flat.

"It's Amber's Succumbing note." He said, his eyes looking down in defeat and regret.

Memories blur my eyes, as they flashed back.

We were ten, little girls who ran around with flowers in hand and mud on our elbows and knees. Amber is laughing because I tripped on my own shoe laces and I half-cried and half-laughing picked myself up and made myself towards my friend who was already seated on the grass patch, she was picking on the leaves of the maple trees before muttering things to herself. She then turned to me.

"Lyra, have you ever liked someone?". I was a child back then so I told her that I liked her. She threw the white petals on me and said "No silly. As in like someone romantically. As in a boyfriend."

I'm dumbfounded at her statement and ignoring my reaction she went on "Well you know it's makes you feel things you never thought you could. As if there were cupcakes and rainbows eveytime you look at the guy."

"But that's not all. "They" would devour you if you're not strong enough."

I'm 19 now, she went at 18. "They" devoured her.

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I had a bit of a mental conflict when I thought of publishing this part. I had thought about the sensitive readers and how word-food can affect a person. Therefore I'd end it with a quote from my teacher. "Life has no definite rule."
Happy life ahead 🌸