Letters to Crush

{33}

It's been a whole month since his Special Friend's last letter. Days have gone by and so do the days that they have left before graduation.

Yeonjun opened his locker for the nth time in anticipation, in desperation to read that final letter his Special Friend was supposed to write to him. However, he found nothing other than his books and his junk. Every single day, three times a day, he opens his locker in hopes that his special friend had left the letter inside.

But there was none.

Today, Yeonjun opens his locker for the second time, seconds after his last locker opening. Maybe magic would work, he thought (as if he had any magic). He was hoping that if he thought of the words "Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo" then maybe the letter would pop up inside his locker. He puts his hand inside, lifting his books and junk to see if the letter accidentally slipped under.

At the realization that he was having no luck, he was downhearted. Yeonjun was desperate to find out who this was. He really wanted to know who this person was because he wanted to thank them for everything. He wanted to thank them for the letters, for brightening his dull days. He was desperate to know who his special friend was and the desperation that he had was equal to the amount of painful wonder to where this letter could be; to why they never gave the letter.

"What are you doing?"

Yeonjun's body freezes. Slowly, turns his head to Chan, he who was staring weirdly and confused at him, with widened eyes. Chan eyes Yeonjun's gesture and just by judging him, he could feel that aura of anxiousness and desperation. A shake of the head. "You look so fucking desperate, man."

Immediately, Yeonjun pulls out his hand from inside the locker, standing upright while facing Chan, clearing his throat. His best friend blinks at him, that weirded-out face unwavering. "Yeonjun, what the fuck has been going on? Why are you acting so strange lately?"

The atmosphere that settled on them was a bit uneasy. Yeonjun gritted his teeth at the feeling. "They haven't been giving me their letter."

"You're still anticipating them?" Chan asked with an eyebrow raised. "Are you going to keep on doing this until the end of the school year cuz that's fricking long, man—"

"Yes!"

A sudden barrier of silence fell in between them. It surprised Chan, especially his friend's sudden outburst of a reply. Behind Yeonjun's eyes, he could see how sad he was and how hurt he was. Likewise, he found no ounce of hesitation nor regret in his eyes which means that what he had said was genuine; that he really meant it. This led Chan to conclude that Yeonjun would waste his time all because of this one letter and it frustrates him. "What if that person stopped writing to you? You're still going to wait for them?"

"Yes of course!"

"Why?"

"It's because they promised me that they would," Yeonjun snapped, giving Chan sharp glares, and so did his emotions make it the more obvious. The clarity of his voice was clear and the feelings that were mixed to it were coming out of its hiding place. Yeonjun could feel his blood heating up and his heart pounding, rate increasing to another mile.

Ever since the start of the year, ever since his special friend sent him letters, Yeonjun had been wanting to meet them. He resisted the urge to go to school every morning to find out who this person was. He resisted the urge to sneak behind the wall and to monitor his locker. He even resisted the urge to place a hidden camera inside his locker just to find out who this person was. Instead, he became patient with them, he waited for excruciating months for them, for his excitement built up to a day that may never come.

He had been waiting for them, and now, he had been waiting for nothing.

Chan opens his mouth, about to say something, but Yeonjun wasn't in the mood to speak to his friend nor was he in the mood to speak to anyone, not anymore. He dismisses the conversation, closes his locker as calmly as possible, turns around and left, leaving his friend to do nothing but to watch him walk away.