𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥 ™€𝐍𝐁𝐀 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐎𝐘💚

006'

𝐀𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐞 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥 𝐁𝐫𝐲𝐞𝐫𝐞

'𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐰𝐭𝐲'

𝐋𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧:🅖🅐🅤🅛🅓🅔🅝 🅡🅔🅢🅘🅓🅔🅝🅒🅔, 🅦🅐🅢🅗🅘🅝🅖🅣🅞🅝,🅓🅘🅢🅣🅡🅘🅒🅣 🅞🅕 🅒🅞🅛🅤🅜🅑🅘🅐
———

I sighed as the sun began beaming in the room right in my eyes. Today was not the day. I was not in the mood. I picked up my phone and looked at the date.

Today was the day my twin brother died. My childhood was mad rough. My family never had it like that. The only person that helped me through it was him.

That nigga was my best friend, my ride or die. He always made sure me and our mama was straight. When our daddy left us, it's been rough for my mom. She grew depressed and doesn't really come out of her room on some days. Me not being there with her rn made me feel bad. As much as I wanted too I couldn't.

I really didn't love my daddy. I hated him growing up. He was an alcoholic.

He raped me several times during my childhood leaving me traumatized.

When my brother found out he took quick action. My brother found out and fought my daddy making him leave.

When I told my mother who it was that got me pregnant she didn't believe me and made me abort it.

I didn't believe in killing a soul but I was young and I never had a say in what I wanted to do.

I don't hate my mama at all. It's just that she had a lot of animosity towards me. She always thought that it was my fault my father left us and my brother died. Fucked up I know.

Ever since he died I never let anyone into my heart. I've already been through enough hell growing up I didn't need any pain on top of that.

I always blame myself for his death even though i had nothing to do with it. But I still felt like it was my fault. That day I was supposed to protect him.

As long as I knew my brother no one ever had any animosity towards him..until one the the niggas he called his homeboy shot him.

I saw the niggas face too. Antonio. That nigga should be locked up right now but he isn't and that's what bugs me. How can someone get away with shit like that.

My brother died right in my arms. I still have so many memories.

Flashback

We were at the basketball court playing one vs. one with each other.

My brother was older than me so I didn't really have to worry about being out so late at night.

"Ha, I beat your ass bitch." My 14 year old self said.