imagine, it is 2002 and you are dating cillian murphy. one night, the two of you are messing around at your tiny london apartment. you insist that he starts pretending to be his characters. the game ends up with him making pig noises as he pretends to be pig aka darren from disco pigs. suddenly the electricity goes off. when it comes back on, cillian has vanished. you look up at the ceiling, and see him slipping into the vents. a few hours later, take me home, country roads starts to play. the song is coming from your brand new cellphone that cillian had bought for you a few weeks ago. you answer it, hoping that it is cillian. "y/n..." he says, out of breath, "i'm leaving you." tears begin to pour from your eyes. "c-cilly, w-wh-why?!?!" you cry out in anguish. "because you smell like a dumpster in the summertime, and moldy cheese." he hangs up after that. after that night, you never see nor hear from him again.
