Too often, we find ourselves alone—with nothing but the dark seeping out of our pores. It's in that darkness, we find ourselves the most vulnerable to the truth.
I'd like to think I accomplished enough in my life, just enough, to leave a lasting mark on people who knew me. Some way to keep my name alive.
My thoughts were interrupted with the crunch of leaves and tree branches.
"What are you doing out here? It's late and cold, no one should be hiking right now!" He was an older man. He looked like my father, making my heart twinge. He was right, the goosebumps on my skin and the moon lighting up the world around us proved his point just fine. I turned away from him, I couldn't let him change my mind.
"I'll go soon." I mumbled, kicking a rock off the ledge. I heard it click it's way to the bottom, where it fell into the dark water. It was calling for me, like siren to prey, humming the syllables of my name so effortlessly.
I wasn't sure when he had left, but he did, leaving me with nothing but my thoughts and whatever was trapped in my head. It was clawing it's way out, I felt it. I knew there was no way to contain it when I let it take me, that it would eat me piece by piece until it finally swallowed me whole. It reminded me of guilt, and like guilt, it was a beautiful disease, really, killing without ever having to say a word. Chewing every bit of you up, grinding you between it's teeth, until you become even a fragment of the person you were before. A vessel.
My foot was dangerously close to the ledge. It was a long way down, and I kicked another rock off to watch it crack as it fell.
I was doing this for love. A promise of love, truly, that I would never get to have a chance with. I had promised my mother, my sister, my fiancée, and my father when he was alive and normal. I promised him love, even when he brought this curse into our life when he died.
When the rock hit the water I thought about all the broken promises that lay beneath its surface. All of the promises that would go down with me, but I had promised them. Even if nothing was left, I would love them, always. I took one step and a breath to fill my lungs with the sharp air. I felt peace, strangely.
The things you would do for love, really. I wasn't one to back down on my promises, so I would love them. Always. I hope they would love me always, too.
I fell into my final step, pushing myself forward, feeling the wind as I fell.
And I let go.
If I was going to sacrifice it all for my family, this curse was going down with me.
