Divided || Kim Namjoon

four.

WARNING: This chapter contains content that can be triggering to some readers. Aspects of violent and manipulative abuse from here in. Read at own risk.

How the fuck were you going to explain this to Namjoon? Would he even let you explain? Would he just shut you out of his life, ignore you completely? Would he give you a chance? Would he hate you for lying to him?

Would you lose him?

He was such a good friend to you. Such a kind, well-mannered man. He liked you. He took care of you. He was interested in you. A genuine interest, like he adored the person you were. You had spent so much time together, just enjoying each other's company and getting to know one another.

You had developed unprecedented and yet genuine feelings for him over the few months you had known him, letting yourself fall deeper into it without giving a second thought to your current situation.

How dumb could you be?

You didn't know how to come back from this. You didn't know how to explain it to Namjoon. You didn't know if he would believe you. You didn't know if he would understand...

'He wouldn't, y/n. No one ever does,' said the voice in your head.

Sangjun's grip around your waist had tightened immensely after the doors had shut in the elevator. You heard his breathing change too; harder breaths being forced out of his nose as he clenched his jaw. He saw him too, you realised. He saw his reaction to the both of you. Now he knows who Namjoon is. He saw the hurt. He must know that he has some feelings there.

And he'll fabricate an entire string of adulterous moments that never happened and use them against you. Now, he thinks something is going on. He thinks you're cheating.

He's close to the truth, of course. But truth won't matter to Sangjun. Whether you had or you hadn't been intimate with Namjoon, he will insist you have.

Things were about to get so, so much worse.

Sangjun practically shoved you against the passenger car door as he bounded over to his side. You dare not say a word; not when he was in this mood. Instead you hastily got in, keeping your mouth shut and your head down until you finally got home.

He barely looked at you as you got into your apartment, not saying a single word but you could see the anger in his face. You followed him into the living room only to be violently launched against the wall as you stepped through the doorway. He hovered over you, his arm across your neck holding you in place. You hit at his shoulders, struggling to get him off you. You could breathe, that wasn't the problem; but you were trapped.

"S-Sangjun-oppa..." you tried to soften him up a little, but it wasn't working. The switch had flipped.

"How many times, huh?" he spat, his nose practically pressed against your cheek as you turned your head away from him.

"W-What do you mean?"

"HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU FUCKED HIM?" he screamed. You winced, your features screwing up as you recoiled from him.

"I haven't, I promise. It's not like that..." you tried to reason with him, to get him to cool off but once he had the idea in his head, it would be one hell of a fight to change his mind.

"Bullshit. Fucking bullshit," he pressed his arm against your throat a little harder, forcing the air out and restricting your breath. "I saw the way you looked at him. I saw the way he looked at you. Didn't tell him about me, did you? Didn't tell your new side piece about your boyfriend, huh?