Memoir (School Project)

Short Story

Family is Forever

     This story takes place the summer after freshman year, just before my fifteenth birthday in June. The main conflict being between my parents, me, and the guy I had just met. Little did I know, dating him would be the worst decision I ever made. 
     It was Saturday, June 1st. The night was cool and the wind chilly. Rain had left the air scented with the smell of damp earth and electric with the searing lightning. I was playing an online game and met a guy named Jacob. He was kind and we started talking about life. We happened to have the same views on many human and worldly things. I realized how nice it was to know someone who shared my same opinion. He was very sweet and offered me his number. I took it without thinking and we started talking. 
     A few days later, June 6th, we . . . started dating. I made my way into the kitchen and asked my dad if he needed help. I ended up making pork chops and mashed potatoes. Then, I got a text from Jacob. He asked to talk so I made my way outside. The sun was setting on the horizon, painting the sky with yellow and pink. I sat on the front porch and called Jacob.
     “As you know, I really like you and maybe even love you,” he murmured quietly. 
     I giggled and asked him, “Is that all you had to tell me?” After a lot of stuttering, he finally asked me to be his girlfriend. Me, not thinking about the consequences, agreed, It slowly dawned on me that if my parents found out, then they would make me end it. There were many reasons for my parents wanting to end it, the main reasons being that he was more than a couple years older than me and he lived in a different state. So I kept him and our relationship a secret. 
     Fast forward about a week, Jacob, in every skype call, would hint and ask and I finally agreed . . . to send him a letter. Once mine was written, addressed, stamped, and sent, he sent me one as well. I had to check the mail every morning, at eight o’clock in the summer, to make sure that my parents wouldn’t find it with their mail. Meanwhile, I held on to the constant guilt that came from lying to my parents. They trusted and still trust me with everything.
      A letter being sent from our distance would take about a week so a week later I got the letter. The night before, I happened to have my friends over for a long-awaited birthday party. At about 9:00 AM, while everyone was asleep, I crawled upstairs and took my dog, Precious, with me to the post office. That morning, the sun thought to show its colors. The star’s rays peeked through the trees to warm the earth below.
      The sounds of birds chirping became the soundtrack to my walk and the sweet smell of flowers, my energy. I then called Jacob, as he told me over and over he wanted to be there when I opened it. I thought I would be a good girlfriend and include him. 
     A few rings and his groggy voice came over the phone, “Hello?”
     “Good morning, Sunshine.” I laughed at his groan. 
      “Don’t call me that, you sound like my mom.” I could almost see his annoyed look over the phone. 
     “I’m headed to the post office,” I smiled lightly, rounding the corner, the post office in view. 
      He perked up immediately, “Really!? I want to see you open it!” The small remaining distance to the post office was filled with his excited talk and banter. The cool of the post office cooled my nerves as I walked inside. I was starting to worry. The past two days, I’ve checked for the letter and it wasn’t there. Maybe it’s there today? I had allowed myself to think as I did every other day. Maybe that day wouldn’t end in total disappointment. Shakily, I pushed the key in the lock and took a breath before opening the box. Inside was one envelope. It was quite thick and looked worn.
      I took it home and ventured to my basement where I had Skyped Jacob. He answered and watched in pure delight as I opened the envelope. The letter expressed his love for me and inside the envelope was a necklace with two heart charms. I loved it and showed it to all my friends once they woke up.
      He loved his so much that I started to write him a new one. The letter was addressed and I had started writing it over one of our Skype sessions. The next night, my parents called me down. Thoughts began to swarm my mind.
     What do they want? Is it another one of their deep talks? Did they go through my phone? However, none of them prepared me for what they had in store. I sat on the carpet and smiled at them but on the inside I was crying and an anxious mess. Silence fell as my parents shared glances. Time seemed to stand still and the only sound, my beating heart.
      “Carlina we know about this,” my momma sighed as my dad pulled out the addressed envelope for my next letter. Through my tears of fear, they began to have a conversation with me about the letter. They wanted more information. Being my stupid self I lied about Jacob’s age and that I had known him before that summer. The only truth I told them was how he was dealing with depression and anxiety and that I was trying to help. Eventually, they ended up letting me continue to talk to him. 
      I always tell my twin everything so I obviously told her. She ended up telling my godmother about how I am struggling and she is worried about me. My godmother came over and I confessed everything to her. She told me many things but the main point was that I had to tell my parents the truth. I agreed and planned with her when to tell my momma. It’s better to tell my mother first so she can support dad and I knew she wouldn’t be as mad as he may have been. 
      At that time my family was working on house renovations and my momma and I had been assigned to painting the porch. As we were working, I told her everything. 
      She sighed deeply, “I can’t promise your dad won’t be mad. Honestly, I don’t really have any idea what he will do. But I am proud of you. For telling me instead of me finding out.” I cried and hugged her until she reassured me and gave me the courage to tell him.
     The weekend of, my aunt was planning on taking me to my grandma’s so I had to tell my dad before I left. He was getting clothes for his shower, so I stopped him and told him everything. After I told him, he looked calm, a little disappointed, but calm. However, I knew he was far from that. He was mad. He was so mad that he’s calm. I also knew he was hurt. When my dad gets hurt he shuts down. 
     So he mustered what life he had, “I hope you know you aren’t gonna get your phone for a long time and just remember that I love you.” There is rare a time you will see my big bad dad vulnerable but at this moment I know I hurt him and it hurt me worse than any physical pain I could ever experience. He kissed my forehead and shuffled to the bathroom.
     When I got to my grandma’s house, I texted my momma telling her everything that happened but she insisted that I still talk to my dad. I was unsure but agreed to it. When my momma and dad came over, momma stayed at the house while dad and I took a walk. He proceeded to tell me over and over again that he was disappointed in me. How he trusted me and I was his best friend. Somehow he managed to say the same phrase in so many different ways.
     Each word hurt worse, like a knife being dug into my heart by my own hand because I did this to myself. My guilt intensified and it really dawned on me that I hurt anyone I lied to and the people that I connected to that I knew I would have to let go. 
      For the next week or two, my dad ignored me. After church on that Sunday, I remained ignored. I would tell him “Hello” and that I loved him. The most I would get back was a “Hi”. He refused to even look me in the eye. This treatment was like a paper and it was added to the pile of hurt that was weighing on my heart, forcing tears out my eyes. 
     Around this time in my life, I discovered a thing called depression. Many of you may know it but I had no idea what it was till that day. I don’t struggle with it that much anymore but it’s still there like a dark cloud that decides to rain only when I’m at my worst and drops tiny knives cutting through any positivity.
     I guess something clicked in my dad because not too long after, he called me downstairs. He sat me down and played a special song. The song was a song he picked out for our daddy-daughter dance at my wedding. I was really confused as to why he played that song until he looked me in the eye and apologized. 
     “I’m sorry Carlina, my baby girl. I was a terrible dad. That was possibly the worst way I could’ve handled it and I hope you forgive me.”
I laughed at that. Why would he want my forgiveness after what I just did to him? Today, I know the answer.
     We are family. Family is there for each other. We pick each other up when we fall, we forgive when it’s hard, and we love where there is none. Never shut out your family. They may be the only thing there for you where other people  aren’t.

Family is forever.