Strike Up A Match

Preface: Is it Love? 사랑인가?

It's been a while since I've felt butterflies; the kind that makes you feel sick but in a very good way. You could say it was "love at first sight", even though it was through a dating app my friend forced me to sign up for. It almost felt like I was being held at gunpoint; my life was basically at stake. Bee, my best friend, claims she knows what is best for me and I listen to her because I don't know even know myself at all. She signed me up for this app called "Strike Up A Match"; stupid name I know. I knew it was stupid, but I did it anyway. At first it was boring, but I'll admit; I got addicted to it. The concept is to swipe left on the people you don't feel a connection with and swipe right on the individuals you find appealing. I was swiping left to right, but no matter how many people I saw, nobody seemed good enough... until I came across him.

    Him.

    I saw his face and as crazy as it sounds I fell in love. I didn't know him, I hadn't even crossed paths with him at any moment of my life, but in that moment; I planned our whole future in just the span of 30 seconds. I swiped right as fast as I could, almost cutting my finger with my phone's shattered screen. At the time, I didn't think we would match. I didn't believe that someone as gorgeous as him would ever think the same as me; but then it happened.

We matched.

    I did something I had never done since my middle school crush on the local skater boy Armando. I rolled around on my bed, happily kicking my legs in the air; I was almost in tears. It was an unfamiliar feeling, but I wasn't a stranger to it. I felt like I had achieved an amazing prize and not just one of those lame "participation" ribbons that they handed out in elementary. It felt amazing to be liked back by somebody; something that rarely happens to a girl like me.

    민태. Min Tae Jr.; Half Korean, half Mexican.

     To make a long story short; He ruined my life. The worst part? He doesn't even know it. "At least he knows about my existence..." is what I like to tell myself every time I see his face. But he doesn't care about me the way I care about him. Why do I care so much about someone that kinda knows my name? Someone that won't even bat an eye if I say "hey how are you?" I really don't want to blame the app because honestly, it's my fault.

     It's my fault that I fell for him. It's my fault that I feel this way. I'm just trying to figure out why I feel this way about some guy that I sent ONE message to and got a one word reply saying: "sure!" Then never messaged me again. Why can't my heart just be normal for once? It's not like Min Tae is fucking Harry Styles or the MCR comeback because that would be a different story.

     Min Tae is just, Min Tae... what do I find in him that is so special? Why is he so special to me?

     Bee really fucked me over this time.

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A/N: This is based on true events and trust me... it gets interesting. I thought about writing something that wasn't based on my life, but honestly this situation is something so frustrating for me that I think writing about it will help me get over this certain person. All names have been changed and no identities will be revealed through this process. More characters will be revealed soon!! Next upload date: Idk lol maybe 11/27? Maybe sooner depends on how demanding my classes are being. Anyway don't let my book flop please & thank you!

- sad girl