Kerosene hearts

1

I kept my head down, bag clutched to my chest tightly as my feet hurried along the long corridor of hell. You see I'm not very popular, in fact I'm not popular at all, I have little to none friends and I'm perfectly fine with it.... most of the time.

I hurried through the corridor full of people and made my way out into the cold air, the breeze hitting my pale skin softly. It was good to breath the fresh air, after spending most of the day stuck inside the hot building, it was nice to be able to finally escape.

I made my way down the stars in front of the school and waited by the gates to be picked up by my mom, embarrassing I know, I'm 17 and my mom still picks me up from school but there's a reason.

I don't really live around this area, I live on the more quieter and posh part of town I guess you could say. Yes I come from a rich family and live in a big house but nobody here at school knows that, if they did then I'm sure they'd treat me differently. I used to go to an all boys school before this, snobby assholes in blazers and ties who enjoyed putting others down, eventually I couldn't take it and decided to move to a public school which is where I've been for about a year and half now.

"Watch it!"

I got shoulder barged by some idiot who wasn't watching where they were going and decided to blame me instead. I ignored him though and apologized, moving out of his way just as a black car with tinted windows pulled up nearby.

I speed walked towards it quickly and got inside, giving my mom a smile as she drove away.

"How was your day?" she asked but before I could reply she was answering the phone and yelling at someone on the other end. I sighed and slumped back comfortably in my seat and watched her.

Her long black hair in waves around her face bounced with every head movement she made; her red lips moved quickly, spitting out quick insults into the phone; her usually bright eyes were dark with  so much anger that I'm sure she could have shot lasers from them.

"Oh, I'm sorry about that Kellin" she sighed and gave me a smile "I'm so sick of these workers! I mean how hard is it to follow simple instructions?.."

I watched her as she ranted on, this is how most of our conversations went, she'd ask me questions and then end up talking about herself instead. I was more or less used it, I couldn't imagine ever having an actual conversation with her anyway. In fact I don't even think I remember ever having a proper conversation, like a normal one, where the mom asks the kid if the test went okay and the kid would reply with.... I don't know. I think too much sometimes.

"I'm leaving for New York tomorrow morning, but the nanny will be here tonight around midnight" she told me as she finally pulled up outside our home.

I followed my mom into the house and dropped my bag by the door.

"I'm 17 mom, I don't need Lisa to watch me anymore" Lisa has watched me since I was 7 and mom got that promotion that she'd "worked oh so hard for". She was like a second mom to me, I saw more her than my own actual mother.

"Don't argue with me Kellin" she sighed, I followed her into the kitchen and watched as she poured a glass of water.

"How long are you going for?" I asked

"Two weeks, three tops. But I'll Skype you every night, I promise"

"That's okay, I wouldn't wanna disrupt your holiday" I turned and left the kitchen, anger slowly building up inside of me.

"Kellin!" I heard my mom shout but that just made me quicken my steps up the stairs and into the safety of my room.

She always did this, she'd leave and go away for weeks on end, months even and never once has she Skyped me like she always promises. Just one, I just wanted one conversation with her where it wasn't about her work.

I sighed and decided to forget about it, dwelling on something won't make it better. So instead I charged my phone and turned on my laptop, my Facebook page immediately popping up on the screen.

Four new notifications, I sighed and clicked on the first one, big mistake. It was a picture posted by some guy at my old school and the picture was of me. Well a pig with my face on it, covered in what looked like cake.

I'm not fat am I? I shook the thought out of my head; don't dwell on it, don't think about it.

'My bud Kellin enjoying some cake' the caption said. I laughed, I can't believe they're still doing this to be honest, I mean I left that school over a year ago.

I slammed my laptop shut not bothering to check all the other notifications undoubtedly they'd be similar to the picture. Maybe if I just got some sleep I can dream of a place where people like me and my mom wants to talk to me, a place where I can be happy about things that other teenagers are happy about. I lay on my bed, the size of it making me feel small and the room empty. I closed my eyes and breathed slowly, imagine a place.