If You Can Hear Me

that day in july...

Claire

The constant beeping was starting to hurt my head.

Three hours of sitting in a bed in the hospital emergency ward would do that to you. It was difficult to tune it out. The only distraction was the pain in my right leg, and it definitely wasn't helping.

Mum and Dad had both left the room to head to the cafeteria, so it was just Travis in the room with me. He hadn't spoken since he'd seen Jenna, and I was doubtful he'd say anything until we got word on how she was doing.

"She's going to be okay," I told him. He looked up at me for a second, but there was no indicator that he understood or believed what I was saying.

It was going to be a long night.

I closed my eyes, hoping for even a few minutes of rest, but the second they were closed, it all came flooding back.

The lights. The deafening crunch of metal on metal. The screech of the brakes.

I blinked a few times, trying to get the picture out of my head. I heard some rustling and looked towards the door. Mum and Dad walked back in, holding some brown bags and take away cups. They didn't say anything as they handed Travis and I each a cup and bag. They didn't even look at me.

Maybe if they did, they wouldn't be able to hold it together anymore. I wouldn't be surprised. Daughter in a hospital bed with a shattered leg, while her best friend was in critical condition.

"You're gripping my hand really tight." I looked down to see both mine and his knuckles turning white. "It kinda hurts."

"Sorry." I pulled my hand away from his. "Didn't mean to."

"It's okay," he said, looking me in the eye, "I know it's been a long night. I just can't stop thinking about-"

"Jenna." He looked away from me. "She's your fiancée. You have a right to be worried."

"Yeah, but you're my sister. I need to be here for you."

I tried to smile. "I'm fine. Focus on her if you need to. I'm gonna be okay."

He looked me in the eye, but didn't say anything more.

Mum grabbed my hand lightly. "Everything's gonna be okay, honey," she said, though it didn't help much. If anything, it brought attention back to the terrible reality of tonight: Jenna and I almost died.

And so the beeping took focus again. It was ridiculous but I began tapping my non-injured foot to the beat. Singing a melody in my head and damn near bopping my head. Incomprehensible words flooded my mind like I was writing a song in gibberish. It was the only thing that kept me from crying.

Just that same round of beeping.

Jenna's parents arrived half an hour after Travis fell asleep. Mr Sawyer looked as stone-faced as always, not showing a hint of emotion, but he swayed in his place the second he stopped walking, which said everything.

His wife was a lot worse for wear: though she'd never admit it, she'd been crying for hours. Her eyes were red and while her eyes showed no hint of mascara, the bottom of her chin said otherwise.

All I could see as they walked into my hospital room was Jenna. In Mrs Sawyer's dark brown hair and Mr Sawyer's glazed-over green eyes.

Travis was awoken by the sudden sound of shuffling, and I could see his eyes shift from exhaustion to dread as he remembered what was going on. He sat up in his chair, but looked at the floor.

Mum walked over and hugged Mr and Mrs Sawyer. "We don't know anything yet. She didn't look great."

Travis and I looked at each other, silently commenting on Mum's inability to be sensitive to anyone's feelings. Travis shook his head and stood up, and went over to hug Jenna's parents.