Will you end this pain?
My head still ranks numb.
I once had so many speaking to me,
But now since then they're only whispers.
I wish I could open this feeling,
I wish I could only feel happiness.
I wish I could stop this numbness,
But the more I try the more I fail.
You once reached to me to help,
But not my cries upon deaf ears.
I try so desperately to speak my word,
But only gasps of air return.
I whisper softly into the night,
All my fears and worries.
I know my face shows,
How quiet my mind is.
Maybe at one night soon,
I won't wake back up in hell.
Maybe at one night soon,
I'll stay in the pleasant dreams called nightmare.
So I yet to question why I am here,
And the reasons of my existence.
It all returns back to you,
And how I miss this.
How I miss people smiling.
How I miss you all returning.
How I miss everyone who has been leaving.
How everyone here was dreaming.
This false sense of security,
I keep pushing myself into,
This writing was an attempt,
To only stop the pain that grows.
But unfortunately for me,
I can never return home.
I cry at night when you sleep,
And pray that you don't hear.
Maybe one night soon I'll be,
And you will never hear these words.
I write and post only trying,
To show you that I care.
In reality I do this for me,
So I my head might speak to me again.
The words I once whispered to myself,
Comforted me.
Now the whispers I hear,
Only try to kill me.
