When I was two I already knew that I wanted to grow up happy.
When I was three I thought it was up to me to make myself grow up happy.
When I was four the truth shook my to my core that I might never be happy.
When I was five I decided to strive to force myself to be happy.
When I was six I watched my brother snap like sticks and the world was a little less happy.
When I was seven I wanted to go to heaven but I learned it was a sin to be happy.
When I was eight I began to hate that everyone else was happy.
When I was nine I took my sadness as a sign that I would never be happy.
When I was ten I begged for my life to end because I didn't want a life that was so unhappy.
The older I get the more I see. It's nearly impossible to be happy. But I swear to god that won't stop me from fucking trying.
