Splendid Shadows (Book 2) The Beautiful Darkness Series

Chapter One-Macon

Hello, Lovelies, 

I missed all of you!  Thank you so much for reading Splendid Shadows!  Thank you to everyone who read Beautiful Darkness.  I truly appreciate all of you.  You are awesome!

News: Nanowrimo is closing and I'm almost to the 50k mark.  My Nano submission, Jaded is on my profile.  I appreciate anyone who checks it out.  I also am in The Grudge contest.  My submission is Welcome Home.  Believe it or not I started writing horror when I was in school.  So, it was nostalgic.  Also, I am still self-editing Sparked.  I have already added over 5k words and the biggest change is the prologue is now part of the first chapter because people were skipping it.  So, I made sure it was read.  After I am done with self-editing, it will go through professional publishing with the wonderful Kim Young.  

I hope you enjoy this chapter.  If you do, please consider voting.  It lets me know I'm doing well.  I love comments.  I love to interact with you.  If you have questions, comment or send me a message.  

-XXXX Amanda

************

I packed my bags in a hurry but Gaige came to the door, his eyes narrowed, "Getting on a plane with weapons is out of the question."

"I have to get there before he does," I said, through clenched teeth.

"Yeah...Well, the last time you did shit without thinking things through, you fucked it up," he said, raising his chin.

"All flights are filled," Abel said, raising his brow as he walked into the room with a bag slung over his shoulder, "So, we're driving."

"What is that?" I asked, pointing my chin toward the bag over his shoulder.

"I'm going with you," Abel said, gritting his teeth, "If the Jararacas are taking the fight to North Carolina, I'm going to be there. Besides, we told Jade she was our family and her baby is our family too...Not just yours."

I wanted to argue but I knew it wouldn't do any good, "I'm going too," Gaige said, his eyes flashing, daring me to deny him.

"So are we," Eri and Urban said, raising his brows, "Tony said he'll watch over the boys while we're gone. I wouldn't insult Antony by saying you don't trust his son."

"I do trust Tony," I said on a groan because I didn't have time to fight them, "Fine. We'll all go."

Gaige stepped in front of me, his eyes flashing, "If you don't fix this, I'm going to shoot you," he said, shrugging, "And I'll aim for the balls."

I raised my chin, "If I don't fix this, I'll let you."

He nodded, his jaw tight as he turned and left the room, "Be ready in five," I called out, "Anyone not ready, will be left."

I pulled the strap over my shoulder, picking up the peace of paper before my eyes landed on Jo's picture album and I narrowed my eyes. North Carolina...That's where her mother was born. I frowned wondering if she had somehow found family. Regardless, the reservation would be the first place I would check.

I picked up the photo album and put it in my bag, hoping I was right because if I was, maybe I was a step ahead of Calvin after all.

*************

I glanced at the speedometer as we crossed the Arkansas state line, shaking my head. I glanced at Gaige with a raised brow, because he was driving the fucking speed limit but his hands were gripped around the wheel so tight that his knuckles were white and his face was grim.

It was obvious he was worried about Jade and not for the first time, I wondered if he was in love with her. The thought sent white-hot jealousy through me but more than that shame because it was my own damn fault if he was.

"Gaige," I whispered, causing him to tense as he had every time I had spoken to him since his return from North Carolina, "Are you in love with Jade?"

He narrowed his eyes, his nostrils flaring, "I love her but no...I'm not in love with her," he said, his eyes flashing, "She's like a sister to me and you hurt her."

"Gaige," I said, ready to explain to him for what felt like the thousandth time why I had broken it off with her but he waved off anything I was about to say.

"You weren't there," he said, his frown deepening, "I'm the one who held her while she cried, Macon. You fucking destroyed her and then, to find out she was fucking pregnant and went through that shit by herself, it pisses me off. She didn't deserve that."

Guilt burned through me, causing my hands to tremble as tears burned my eyes. In my whole life, Jade was the one who received most of my tears. Maybe Gaige didn't believe I loved her after what I did, but I did...More than anyone in this shitstorm of a world. The fact she had been broken by me when all I wanted to do was protect her killed me.

"I know she didn't deserve it," I said, shaking my head, "I was trying to fucking protect her. She was desperate to come back and I couldn't let her when Calvin was there, trying to get to her."

"Do you fucking think I would let her come back?" He yelled causing me to wince, "You didn't fucking trust me!"

"It had nothing to do with not trusting you," I said, trying to stay calm, "I acted out of god damn desperation! I thought out of everyone, you would understand that!"

Gaige winced and that awful guilt and shame slammed through me. Gaige's girlfriend, Andrea, had been killed when we had gone up against some drug dealers. They had found out we were stopping their shipments and had somehow gained Gaige's name. Instead of him sending Andrea away, he gave in to her pleas to stay and it had ultimately ended in her death and I was the fucking asshole that brought it up.

"I'm sorry," I said but it wasn't enough. It was never enough. I kept making mistake after mistake and screwing up everyone around me.

Gaige swallowed, his face stoic, "I do understand but you could have trusted me a bit more. If you had it wouldn't have been like this. At least she wouldn't have been alone."

I gritted my teeth unable to deny it, "I know."

"You better fucking trust us when we get there," Gaige said, shaking his head, "I love you like a brother but if you don't trust us and if you don't fix this with Jade and bring her back into our family where she belongs, I'm going to kick your ass and then, I'm going to shoot you in the balls as I promised."

I nodded, "I'm going to trust you and I'm going to fix everything with Jade," I said, my heart aching, "If I don't, you can shoot me in the balls and then, put me out of my misery."

He nodded, his lips twitching into a grin even though his eyes were still dark with thoughts of Andrea.

"Deal," he said before pressing the gas pedal to the floor, racing to the woman who held my heart in her hands. It was up to her whether it continued to beat or not. I could only hope I still had a chance after all these months. If I didn't and lost her, the misery that followed would be all my fault. I would have to face my life knowing I deserved the pain.

I leaned my head against the window, watching as the scenery of trees, forests and fields blurred until I closed my eyes in sleep and dreamed of Jade saying I love you on a loop that wouldn't end until she said those words to me again but this time I was going to fucking say them back.