Despair

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Y/N:
I was in my room thinking on how I hate my life and how I hate my family with a passion. It so unfair that I get treated like dirt or like a second class citizen. All because of my ADHD, weight and so called"Gayness". But my ADHD is a lesser know one, where a person thinks of multiple things at once, but I still get treat like I have disabilities. Also don't forget the weight gain, they are the reason I gain weight and loss weight and they are definitely the reason to my depression. It's so sad that no cares about me, sometimes I would dream of what death would be like. No more pain, No more Sorrows, just freedom from this hell I call life. When ever I had those thoughts, I would just think of how I just could end it all right now with one cut. All I ever wanted in my life is to just be loved and held and reassured that everything is going be alright.

Its so silly but the happiest I ever remember I was is when I was a kid and I would dream of a prince charming or a shining knight in armor taking me away to a far away kingdom and getting married and living happily ever after. But my family crushed that dream long ago. Who would ever love me, I'm not fat any more but I still feel so ugly. My BFF was the only person that I know to ever call me cute or handsome. She would even make me feel sexy for wearing tight jeans and having a bubble butt. Because of her I lost a lot of weight, but she was the only person to ever really care for me. I was heart broken when she had to move away and leaving me alone again.

[SCENE SKIP] Highschool 2 Months Later.

Y/N:
Things have been getting harder since my BFF Alice had to move. I was feeling like a lamb to the slaughter or sheep to a pack of hungry wolves. I was all alone again and had no one to talk too. But what is worst is that I'm getting bullied more since my BFF was not there to back me up. Sometimes I wished that I could go to another Highschool in Virginia. But my family would never do that, so I'm stuck with going to Orange County Highschool. The school that's partially the reason to my depression. Almost all the students that I meet there are so two face and I hate it. One moment I'm making friends and the next moment I'm being treated like I'm lower than them. All because of my ADHD or other factors. I already lost count of how times people ask me if I'm in any special ED classes, All because of having ADHD. But I do love my classes, but I have to say my favorite subject in school is history. I did enjoy choir at first, but my teacher just put too much pressure on me and always get mad if I'm not doing good even though me and another male student were the only ones in own group singing. But my new favorite class is French class. I love how the French language sounds and love the culture.

But at the time I didn't know it, but I will discover something amazing that will shock my family and everything that I knew about my family.

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⏰ Last updated: Apr 13, 2020 ⏰

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