- chapter one -

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I'm sitting in the hospital room beside my girlfriend lying in the bed. They told me she's in a coma. "For how long?" They shrugged their shoulders at my emotional question. "Whenever she wants to wake up."

"Babe, I took a test. I'm pregnant!" Leah squealed, so excited. "We're having a baby?!" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Leah and I were starting our own family. I couldn't wait to tell everyone.

I wipe my teary eyes. No more baby. No more Leah. She probably won't remember who I am. I walk out of the room, needing some fresh air. I dial the number of the only person I can stand right now. "Hey man," I choke out.
"How is she?" My brother, Beau, says from the other end. "Still in the coma. We lost the baby." I can't hold back any longer, I start to cry uncontrollably. "I'm coming to the hospital. Wait there." He hangs up. I sit down on the cold ground, weeping, waiting for my big brother to come take the pain away.
Beau arrives a few minutes later and spots me outside, still sitting down. "Come on, get up...it's too cold out here." He helps me up and ushers me back into the last place I want to be right now. "Tell me everything."

"We have to paint the nursery today!" Leah exclaims. "You mean I'm painting the nursery today. You're not going anywhere near the paint. It's bad for the baby." She rolls her beautiful blue eyes at me, knowing I'm right. I usually am. "I hope the baby has your eyes." I smile at my girlfriend. "Well I hope they have your smile." She strokes my cheek and kisses me. "Get to work." She winks. I watch her walk out of the room and wonder how I got such an amazing woman in my life.

Beau has tears in his eyes as I finish going over the horrific events of the day. "Why her?" He holds back tears.
"You're asking me?" I wipe my eyes for the millionth time. "Have you told Luke and Mum?"
"Not yet. Would you be able to? I can't handle going over it again." Beau rests his hand on my shoulder and nods. "Does her family know?" He asks and I nod. "They're on their way. Their flights are like fourteen hours." I bow my head. "It's all my fault."

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