Judge, Jury, and Executioner - [Jopper]

07. Under the Influence

When he had come home the previous evening, she had a suspicion that he had visited the bar during his time spent away from everyone. But when he had come home the second time, there was absolutely no evidence. Her police training had kicked in for a mere second, wondering where the hell he had gone if he hadn't gone out to drink. That thought lasted only a few moments before the rush of the present kicked in and they fell into a screaming match.

But then she had woken up before the clock had struck midnight, hearing his tires peel out of the driveway. She had closed her eyes, forcing herself to go back to sleep right then and there or else she would stay awake and worry. He clearly didn't want to be worried about, so she decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. 

Maybe he had been right. Maybe she really couldn't understand what was going on in his head. Maybe there was no way in hell she could even begin to try to comprehend the hell he had been through. She knew how hard she was pressing him and she hated herself for it. Down to the core of her actions was the fear of losing him again. But the rational sense inside of her told her that she had the right to be angry, he broke a promise. 

She understood and then she didn't. Herself as a police officer could understand the barriers of his trauma, but herself stripped away of a badge and a title couldn't seem to comprehend it. Both sides of her brain were working against one another, and she was left with the constant cycling between understanding and not. 

So, when she had heard his car pull out of the driveway near midnight, she stayed as still as stone. She couldn't chase him down and drag him back each and every time. If he needed time alone, she'd rather it be in the dead of night when the world was supposed to be asleep. He had done what she had wanted him to do; open up. Even when his words were spit with venom and anger, all she had wanted was a sentence more than three words. He had done that, he was free to go. 

Her last thoughts before falling back asleep was her focus on just how cold the sheets were. She thought back to their first night home and just how warm and cozy the world had been. Before everything had the chance to rush back and take their full attention. That night was the calm before the storm, just two people holding each other ridiculously close in an attempt to ward off the demons.