tuning out - h.e.s.

Dream Log 1 - The Mighty Fall

In my dream I see Him. I say "Him" but the thing that haunts my dreams is certainly not human. He resembles a man, only he has an unearthly presence. His entire body seems to glow with a sort of celestial light.

In my dream, we stand on the roof my gray apartment building. I stand in the doorway leading up from the floors inside. He stands on the edge of the building, facing away from me. His toes curl over the edge of the concrete and he looks down at the street below. The sun in the distance is only a sliver over the horizon. I try to walk to him but my black sneakers stick in the gravel. I try to lift my feet but my body does not respond. The early morning breeze ruffles his hair and makes him sway back and forth ever so slightly.I close my eyes and breathe in the crisp morning breeze. All is quiet besides cars in the distance. The city beyond is waking up, slowly but surely. Lights flicker on in windows and birds chirp. The world is peaceful.

He clenches his fists and stretches his arms up. His lets them drop and shakes them out. He stands stock still on the edge. He raises his arms away from his sides and long thin gold vines start to sprout from his fingertips. They flow like molten metal flowing in streams in the air. They grasp on to the gray edge of the building and hold firm. The vines grow longer and longer and dig into the cement. Gravel skids about and the vines burrow into the roof. Vines snake around the edge of a build and squeeze tight. The building cracks under the pressure. They plant themselves inside the thick walls of the building. He looks up at the sky, as if taking in the sun. His vines start to turn a beautiful shade of gold. Yellows and oranges swirl in the vines making them look like the sun itself. He turns his head so I can see part of his face. The rising sun illuminates his eyes and I see him smile. His smile fades and he lets out a sad sigh. He looks down at the concrete below the edge of the building.

Suddenly, his vines turn a dark green. He stops bathing in the
sunlight and looks frantically around him at his slowly dying vines. They turn
black and the look on his face shows he is in pain. tears fall from his eyes and his body shudders with each sob. I want to help him but my body remains immobile. He starts to lose balance as the vines' grip on the building loosens. They start to crack and snap in half. The vines that are still attached to his hands shrink back from their place around the wall. When the last vine breaks, he turns around and looks straight at me. What is he doing? I think to myself, but I already know the answer. The look in his eyes say I give up.

"No!" I scream, but his face softens and I can tell he has made up
his mind on what he was about to do. He smiles and raises his arms as if beckoning me to embrace him. When I don't move, He closes his eyes and leans backwards.
He falls.
Straight and fast off of the 13 story building. I manage to make my body move and run to him, to catch him, to slow him, anything that will allow me to meet him but it is already too late. When I reach the edge of the building I look down and see him lying on the pavement below, cracked like a porcelain doll.

There is no blood; only scorch marks where it looks as if the ground has been
burned around him in the same pattern of his vines. I reach out my arm and call out a name I cannot hear. The world around me turns blurry like a wet photo. The sky blotches and changes until it is the same ugly beige as my bedroom walls. I stare up at my ceiling, feeling as tired as I would have if I just didn't sleep. I look over at my clock.

1:12 it reads. I sigh and roll over. At least the dream is over. Now I
can sleep in the pitch-black world of dreamless unconsciousness.