Identity °A Guardian Fanfiction°

Identity

Zhao Yunlan has always wondered about the man under that dark mask and black cloak. The envoy was so closed off, as if his appearance was a solid representation of his entire existence. No one knew who he truly was, and no one bothered to know. For that was the purpose of people with power. They were labeled based on what they do. No one cared who the Black Cloaked Envoy really was inside, they only see the being strong enough to defeat all Dixingians. Nothing else mattered.

But now as Zhao Yunlan watches the figure of a certain professor while he prepares food for the both of them, he now wonders how much of what they see is the true Black Cloaked Envoy. Because the man he sees right now is very different from the man who judges impartially. Shen Wei is gentle and caring while The Black Cloaked Envoy is cold and strict. Zhao Yunlan still could not grasp the fact that these two beings were the same person, but that's what makes interacting with them unique.

Whenever Zhao Yunlan was with Shen Wei, he remembers how the same man has fought in the great war and has defeated the leader of the Dixing rebellion, resulting in the peace of the whole world. Similarly, Zhao Yunlan often sees The Black Cloaked Envoy in all his glory and remembers the man who loves teaching. The man who has spent more time in Yunlan's house than his own, treating it like his home. The man who is so attractive that he can snatch anyone's heart, but still seems to get jealous of Zhu Hong sometimes. The man who has never failed to protect Yunlan with all he could.

Besides, there was one thing that clearly puts them together. One huge piece of the puzzle that Yunlan himself found so easily. It was that both of them, whether it was the powerful envoy or the intelligent professor, clearly cared for Zhao Yunlan with all their heart and soul.

The chief still didn't know how to feel about that.

He comes back to his senses when Shen Wei turns around, placing their food on the table. This has become part of their usual routine. When Shen Wei first found out that Yunlan couldn't cook and would eat whatever was available even if it was rotten, the professor raged, like he does every time he finds out about another one of Zhao Yunlan's destructive habits. Yunlan didn't have the heart to decline Shen Wei's offer to cook for him everyday. It made both sides happy. So now, Shen Wei would come over to his house and cook one of his delicious meals. Sometimes he would even clean, and Yunlan didn't know if letting the Black Cloaked Envoy do the dishes for him was a respectful thing to do, but he was just flippant like that.

These were another one of those moments when Zhao Yunlan questions who he really was for the Black Cloaked Envoy himself to treat him like this. What has he done? Sure he was friendly and easily got along with other people, but what Shen Wei feels for him seems to be deeper than just that. In many instances has Shen Wei disregarded the law just to help or please the chief. Everyday Yunlan wonders if he deserves this. He was just an arrogant, pretentious police officer that just so happens to deal with extraordinary cases. Why was he the one being treated so respectfully by the man who deserves more respect?

"Zhao Yunlan?"

Yunlan looked up at the voice calling out his name. He didn't realize he was spacing out again. Maybe it was just the never ending cases getting into his mind, filling it with worry and uncertainty. He can feel that something big was coming, but he's not sure if he can handle it. As the chief, he had a lot of weight on his shoulders, and he's afraid of disappointing his members or worse, the entire human race.

"Yunlan."

The man shook his head, getting all those thoughts out.

"Yeah?"

"Are you alright?" Shen Wei asked. And there it was again. That look Shen Wei gives him that makes him feel like he was the most important person in the world. Yunlan could only nod in reply.

"Yeah. Let's eat."

Yunlan grabbed his chopsticks and proceeded to fill his mouth with food, trying to distract himself from the constant flow of negative thoughts. Shen Wei stayed silent and watched.

"Yah Shen Wei. Stop staring like that or I'll melt." Yunlan looked up at him, grinning, but Shen Wei could see that he was just trying to hide his discomfort. The usual mischievous glint in his eyes were absent.

"You know I would never let that happen." Shen Wei replied, and he could see how Yunlan's façade crumbled slightly. The other looked away, still trying to act nonchalant.

"Aah what did I ever do to make you care for me so much? Am I just that charismatic?"

This time, it was Shen Wei's turn to be stunned. Why was he asking this? Did he find anything new about the past? Shen Wei wasn't ready to tell him yet.

"You know, I'm starting to deem myself unworthy of your constant care and compassion. Don't you have anyone you love? A family member? Maybe even a lover back in Dixing?" Yunlan wiggled his eyebrows at the professor, letting out a teasing laugh, but when Shen Wei only stared at him with his questioning face, he just looked away and went back to eating.

That's when it clicked for Shen Wei. He chuckled, getting Yunlan's attention away from his food.

"I don't. I thought we already settled this." Shen Wei said. Yunlan paused, clearly confused.

"Ah... haha... of course-"

"The reason why I'm treating you like this is one that I cannot disclose right now." Shen Wei looked straight into Yunlan's eyes. The other looked slightly uncomfortable but he continued to listen. "But... one thing has always been apparent as to why I care so much."

"And what is that?"

"Because you are different, Yunlan. You were the first to understand me, and see me as more than just the man who could fight well."

Yunlan chuckled at that.

"It is because of your carefree personality that makes everyone so drawn to you, but it's your sincerity that keeps them attached. That is why although you bicker a lot with your members, they will not hesitate to help and support you in times of need. It is because they know that you will do the same for them."

Yunlan was now staring intensely at Shen Wei, a flow of emotions flashing through his eyes. He was like an open book, but one written so well that it takes time for Shen Wei to decipher him. Apparent, yet still mysterious.

"That is why I was drawn to you at the very beginning." Shen Wei looked down as he recalled a certain memory. "You have always been so bizarre and strange, yet when the time calls for it, you become serious. You knew exactly how to pull at my heartstrings."

Yunlan laughed at Shen Wei's sudden confession, although there was a tint of pink dusting his cheeks.

"What I'm trying to say is... you are a great person, Zhao Yunlan. And I know just now you were doubting yourself, but remember. So many people look up to you. That should be enough verification right? And if you can't handle something, that is not because you are lacking. Everyone from the SID are here to help you. I'm here to help you."

The two sat there in silence. It wasn't awkward or uncomfortable. More like two people starting to understand each other, like the last two puzzle pieces finally found and coming together.

Zhao Yunlan smiled. Shen Wei never failed to make him feel special and wanted, no matter how much more powerful he was compared to the chief. And if before he was unnerved by it, now with Shen Wei's words in mind, Yunlan feels much better about himself. He decides that if the great Black Cloaked Envoy was going to treat him like this, then he should at least make an effort to become someone worthy of it.

"Shen Wei-ah. What will I do without you?"

"Probably die of hunger."

Yunlan laughed.

"That's true. Hey. You wanna know something? Whenever I looked at the Black Cloaked Envoy before, I always noticed his bright, beautiful eyes. It just didn't seem to fit there, you know? He always seemed to act so mysterious and firm, but his eyes shone like stars. Then I realize that there was a precious man hiding underneath."

Yunlan flashed another mischievous smile, and unlike last time, this one was genuine. He looked so proud of his teasing, and it proved successful based on how Shen Wei's face turned beet red and he looked away.

"Shut up and eat."