Chapter IV

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" 'Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all." - Alfred, Lord Tennyson

March 17, 2019

Jeff, Jason, David, Cass, and I stood in David's living room waiting for Natalie to come out.

"I upgraded Natalie to first class as a surprise," Jason said.

"That's so sweet," I said.

"But it's gonna leave you all alone, Cass," Jason said.

"That's fine," she said.

"No it's not," I said. "I can take Nat's seat."

"You don't have to do that," Cass said.

  "No, it's fine, really."

  We were all standing around talking when Jeff started to complain about the fact that we were going to somewhere really cold.

"You're from Staten Island, you're really complaining about the cold," I said to Jeff.

"Staten Island never drops below fourteen degrees," he responded.

"I don't believe that," I said, rolling my eyes.

  "Why don't we just switch trips?" Jeff asked. "Ya know, be spontaneous?"

  "No." I responded.

  "I'd do it." Jason piped in. "Saint Patricks day in Chicago is gonna suck. It's cold the whole time, people are just drunk the whole time, too-"

"That's what makes it so fun, Jason." I said. "The energy, the music, a few bar fights here and there, and it's one of the few days people actually get along in Chicago."

"That's not really my thing anymore." Jeff said.

"You hang with David and partying isn't your thing?" I said, looking at him and raising my eyebrows slightly.

"I'm a recovering alcoholic."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"It's fine."

"David's much nicer when we're home, though, so the chances of you guys getting hit with paintball guns are practically zero."

"What do you mean 'you guys?' You've never been hit with a paintball gun?" Jeff asked.

"The last time David tried to shoot me with a nerf gun, I broke his nose because he scared the living shit out of me so now he just doesn't try shit."

"Does it actually work?" Jason asked, hopeful.

"I think you would break your wrist before breaking his nose, old man." I responded. "And you're too dad like to hurt David."

I left the group and went to Nat's room.

"Hey." Nat said smiling at me while she tried to zip her suitcase. I walked over and sat on it to help her.

"Hi." I responded.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Do you think Jeff hates me?"

  "So, something is wrong?"

  "Ugh, I don't know."

  "Well got my bag zipped, if you just want to get your fat ass off of it."

  "Ya know what, fuck you Natalie." I said laughing.

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