Always the Bad Girl Never the Good Girl

Chapter 7 : you are wrong.

Sometimes in life there are things that are bound to be hidden , in a dark place where no one could find them or know them . Things that are better left unknown because the truth always hurts . And it's crazy what we do to keep the people we love safe , and to try to save them from the ugly truth.
What i've done might be the craziest thing ever , but I did it for a good cause because no matter what i'll say if they find out the truth they are going to suffer forever.
..............
The door bell rang.
It must be Jason he said he'll come over at 4 in the afternoon and it is about time he showed up.
I was still shocked by the events of last night making out with Jason , him apologizing about being rude , the party , the hangover ..... And the list goes on and on.
" Hey" I said opening the door for Jason
"Come on in "
"Hello beautiful" he said with a smile that made my heart melt "it's been a long time since I last been in here "
"Yeah it is "
"Are we alone in here ? "
"No Ella is also here in her room , mom and dad are probably on a business trip"
My father and mother were both superior cadre in a company we are rich but not super rich like millionnaires or something , but still they don't always stay at home they travel at least 3 ,4 times each month .
.....
"So , about what happened yesterday .."
I started when we both went to my room , we were both sitting in my bed looking at each other intensily
"Before we talk about that , you owe me an explanation"
"An explanation? " I asked pretending not to know what he was talking about
"Stop pretending , l know you know what I am talking about , why did you pretend to be this bad person ? "
"I don't know what you are talking about "
"Cut it out Eleanor you won't fool me anymore."
I took a deep breath closed my eyes , it is time to be back to the bitchy Eleanor
"You seriously think I am pretending ? Why would I even do that? Is this about the make out ? I mean It's not a big deal we didn't even sleep together, unfortunately but hey it's not too late to change that "
"Shhhhh" he put his soft fingers on my lips and traced by bottim lips with his finger "you won't fool me twice Ellie , I saw the real you yesterday , you cried your heart out , I saw the pain and the hurt in your eyes , whatever is happening just tell me I can help"
You can't Jason ...No one can .
"I was upset okay? I had a rough day my parents wouldn't leave me alone and they kept nagging , even some teachers got on my nerves and I needed to cool off . And believe me making out with you was such an escape , " I flashes my eyelash at him and looked at him dangerously.
"Don't you want to continue what we started yesterday Jay Jay ? "
"Eleanor just say the truth already I know you are faking it "nhe looked annoyed this time I guess I wasn't being too much convincing but I can't let him know I really can't it's already bad that Ray knows some of the truth but if he knew too they'll eventually find a way to make me reveal my secret and all I've done this years would fade like it never happened. I couldn't let that be realised ...I couldn't.
"You know what ? Forget it. I only wanted you in my bed but now you are starting to blaffe and say stuff that doesn't make any sense . Are you seriously the bad boy I used to know? Because right now you are acting like a baby and I am done with-"
I was inturrupted by some soft lips crashing into mine . He was kissing me . Surprised, I didn't do anything but then I kissed him back deeply turning his passionate kiss to a wild one , we kept kissing like there was no tommorow and then we parted to take some breath Jason placed his hands on my cheeks cupping it
"Ellie... Tell me that this didn't mean anything to you , tell me ! "
"I..I....I don't know okay? I like you but not like before I changed Jason why does everyone want an excuse to make me seem better why? this is who I am I just got bored being the good girl I wanted for once to be the wild girl I always was deep inside so please stop asking me what's wring because everything is perfectly fine "
"NO." he yelled at me gripping my arm a little too harshly " you can't just change like that , Eleanor that I knew would never make fun of others she would always try to help them making friends with the lonely people so that they don't feel rejected by everyone , eleanor that I knew was the sweetest person alive the girl that made me change from the badboy I was the girl who would make everyone want to be friends with her because she was the nicest person you could ever know ... someone like that doesn't change for no reason so I dare you to look at me in the eyes and tell me I am wrong"
So I did what he asked , I looked at his deep blue eyes and said "you are wrong, there done ! Suck it up Jay Jay I told you countless times I changed that's all so just stop fucking annoying me with your stupid question because the old Eleanor is dead this is the new me"
the look in his eyes after I said those words made me want to throw my arms around him and tell him'everything to make him feel better but I couldn't
"I see.... Then you are dead to me too , kissing you was a mistake it won't happen again in fact I don't want to talk to you ever again . goodbye Eleanor "
He didn't wait for my reply and went downstairs and got out of the house almost immediatly I tried to hold my tears but they kept falling and falling and next thing I found myself crying my heart out . I needed to clear my mind so I took my sun glasses put them on and grabbed my car keys and went to the only place where I could gather all my thoughts and feel peace and forget everything : the forest.
People fear the forest but what they don't know is that after you reach the end of it you'll find the most beautiful lac ever , almost no one ever comes here and it is so peaceful and beautiful that it makes me forget who I am for once.
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I kept looking at the beautiful lac in front of me the sun was shining the wind was caressing my face softly it was a beautiful day so I took my clothes off staying in just my underwears and went to swim in the lake , I closed my eyes and let the tears fall until I had no tears left and after many hours of crying and clearing up my mind I went out of the lake wore my clothes and went back to the car .
I got a text from the girls earlier telling me that they were up to some shopping so I told them that I'll join them after I change my clothes .
After doung that I went to the mall and we kept buying clothes and the girls kept gossiping about people I wouldn't care of but suddenly someon'e bumped into me
"Well well well look who we have here"
I smirkef'd at the two girls in front of me
"Fuck off eleanor" she said holding her friends hand and trying to get away
"Oh lucy why so rude I didn't say anything ... Well at least for now but why are girls in such a rush ? I know you well you don't go shopping very ofté so unless you have a date then ... Well who's the looser ? "
"Jason black and he isn't exactly a looser isn't he ? Oh and Jamie is having the date with him not me , not that i owe you any explanation but you should finally see even tour dear Jason is moving on and forgetting you just like everyone else"
Her words hurted me so much but I couldn't make her see
That I was in pain and my heart ached
"I don't think so actually hey little Jamie did you ask him about what happened last night after he dropped you? "
She looked at me confused "what do you mean?"
"Oh I see he didn't tell you , let's just say that We did some pretty interisting things I'd be very happy to tell you but why would I ruin all the fun ? Go ask him"
"She is just saying shit Jamie don't listen to her she's a bitch"
"I hear you lucy"
"I know. " she said clodly
"Well listen to me petite You better watch that mouth of yours or else you'll see what will happen oh and I am not shitting you guys I am saying the truth just go ask him and you'll see , he is just using you like everyone else poor baby""
And with that I walked away my head high and kept shopping with the girls but all I kept thinking about was that Jason was such a jerk how could he make out with me tell me he misses me and after we have a fight he tell me he is moving on and then he asks anothet girl on a date ? Was I just a game to him ? I mean he sure moved on pretty fast but one thing I know is that I won't let him be a herk and hurt Jamie she doesn't deserve to be a rebound I might not know her but no one deserve to be used like that he'll break her heart..
But didn't you break his? The stupid voice in the back of my head stated
Yeah i guess I did but I had to and He must be in such a pain but i Won't let him use other people to get over it I won't .
I said goodbye to the girls and went to my car I had to talk to Jason again.