Friend, Please

Chapter 2: Exhausted

Deceit stumbled along, noticing it grow colder, deader, as he traveled further. He clutched the hoodie closer as he moved along the dark, expansive planes, where everything was the same shade of dark, soul-sucking gray. He could feel the tug of the abyss in the distance.

Deceit didn't know if dying would remove Thomas' ability to lie. But It certainly seemed worth a shot. He was just so tired... so numb. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity in comparison to Deceit's ever-quickening heartbeat, he reached what appeared to be the end, the edge of a cliff that dropped into an ever-darkening pit.

Logan had once talked about a theoretical 'black hole' that housed all of Thomas' lost and forgotten dreams. This seemed to be it — a final, silent resting place. 

A sourceless wind howled around the liar, seeming to urge him to jump. It was so cold, Deceit hugged his body, trying to gain some warmth as he wept. Why is this hard? A voice in the back of his mind asked. It wasn't his, and typically, Deceit would have been far more disturbed to be in a situation like this, but at the moment, he really couldn't be bothered to care. It shouldn't be hard. You have a million reasons to jump right now. Do you have a single reason not to?

Deceit's thoughts flickered to Remus and Wrath, but he was quickly reminded of Wrath's frustration at having been woken up. Wrath would be so upset if he found out Deceit had attempted suicide-

committed, the voice chastised. Not attempted. You are going to jump. Sure Wrath will be upset, but he's always upset. I doubt you killing yourself will even bother him.

And Remus... so patient, trying so hard to behave himself, to not disturb the other side when he was like this. He had offered to stay... he cares, doesn't he?

The voice laughed at him, an evil boom that caused Deceit to flinch. How many times has he suggested you kill yourself? Jump out of a moving car, poison yourself... it wouldn't bother him either, Deceit. I bet he'd be thrilled. Too bad he never got to see all of those cuts and bruises you've given yourself. Think about it- he'd love to have you dead.

Deceit's hope shattered. He didn't know what this voice was or where it came from, but it was right.

His mind drifted to Virgil, but he didn't even stop to dwell on the thought. He wanted to believe that even though Deceit hated him, he didn't wish him dead, did he? But it was useless. The habitual liar had made up his mind.

He dried off his eyes on the sleeve of the hoodie, shivering. He took a step forward to the edge. Good. Go on. You know what to do, Deceit. Just jump.

He was on the very edge when he heard something. Footsteps. Soft music coming from what must have been air pods at full volume. The obnoxious sound of slurping. He had never met this aspect of Thomas, but he knew who he was by reputation.

Like a frightened animal, he whirled around, facing the man. Sleep. The man was exactly as he had been described. Deceit couldn't see his eyes behind is Sunglasses, but Sleep was clearly surprised. He was holding a Starbucks in one hand, and a white Valentino bag in the other.

"Yo babes, who are ya and what'cha doing out here? It's not exactly safe." He said after a minute, walking up next to Deceit. He held out the Starbucks as if he wanted Deceit to hold it, and the side obliged, hoping his hands weren't shaking too much. "Thanks," Sleep said, opening and overturning the bag over the abyss. A bunch of glowing little clouds tumbled from the bag, falling into the pit, flickering out and being absorbed. 

Sleep closed the bag, took his drink back and turned to Deceit, who's mouth hung open in awe. "What were th-those?" He stuttered in the cold, glancing back to the abyss, rubbing his gloved hands together for warmth. 

Sleep clicked his tongue. "Nuh-uh, babes, I asked you a question. Who are you and why are you out here?"

Deceit didn't want to answer. He wanted to just jump. But he couldn't do that in the presence of Sleep. He wanted his death to be a solitary affair. Finally, he spoke, hoping he would be able to convince Sleep to leave.

"I'm D-D-Deceit," he choked out, his voice cracking as he felt like he was going to cry again. "And I'm here b-because I am going to jump." 

Sleep, instead of gasping, just sighed. "Another one, really?" he said to himself, shaking his head.

Deceit didn't understand. "What d-do you mean, another one?"

Sleep ignored him. "I'm Remy, by the way. Or Sleep. And what I just threw in there were more dreams."

"Dreams?"

"Yeah. I'm literally Sleep. That's my job, ya know. I toss out the useless ones every couple of days. But you know Deceit, you really shouldn't jump."

"Wh-why?" Deceit choked, his vision getting hazy from the cold. But Remy seemed unaffected.

"Well, I mean you're a side. Dying would really hurt Thomas. And don't give me any of that 'but I'm toxic' crap, that's ridiculous."

"Ridiculous?" Deceit repeated quietly, feeling too weak to say more. The voice had not stopped quietly repeating that he needed to jump, but he still couldn't help but wonder what Remy meant.

Remy finished his Starbucks and tossed it into the pit, turning back to Deceit. "Okay. How do I explain this..." after a few seconds thinking, he clasped his hands together, pointing at Deceit. "Boi. Any side, if they work too much In Thomas's life, has a bad effect. I've never understood your silly terms of 'Light' and 'Dark' sides. It's silly."

"What do you..." Deceit's speech was falling apart. "What do you mean?"

Remy sighed. "Did you ever see that Yerkes-Dodson curve Logan had? Too much of something is not very cash money, but so is too little. It applies to me, it applies for you, really any part of Thomas, if rejected or overworked, will have bad consequences, babes."

Deceit was numb from cold and starting to see spots. He knew his speech was a bit slurred. "Okay. Maybe Thomas needs me. B-But that doesn't change the fact that everybody in the mindscape seems to hate me!"

"Hate you?" Remy blew a raspberry. "Nah. Dislike? Maybe. But not hate."

The voice in Deceit's head grew louder and he shuddered. It kept hissing at him that Remy was wrong, that he was lying. But Deceit was... well, Deceit. Lying was his thing, he could tell when somebody wasn't telling the truth.

"You... You really believe that" it was more of a statement than a question.

"Hells yeah," He laughed, pulling out his phone. "Okay, buddy. Since you're not looking so good, I'm gonna call some people to come to get you. I'm sure your pals will be happy to see you alive and breathing."

"oh good..." Deceit smiled, his knees buckling. It was so cold. So dark. It was pulling him toward the edge.